buttnugget040 Posted July 16, 2007 Share Posted July 16, 2007 i don't know what it is , I mean my sister gets bullie , but she dresses like everyone else but she's smart , and sh's ADORABLE ! now can anyone tell me why she is bullied? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Droopsy Posted July 16, 2007 Share Posted July 16, 2007 Yep, the same for me. As long as it's one-to-one it is more or less ok most of the cases, but when there is a group of people I feel that they all have their place in it and they talk about something all the time, but I just don't have anything to say, can't fit in and find my place. totally the same for me...I mostly just standing with my friends... sometimes of course i talk, mostly with ONE person at a time... but I dunno, i kinda feel like, well, whatever I'll say will be ignored so.... well because it's mostly the case, when i say something it's: 'oh, hmm' and they start talking about something else so yeah, there u go:mf_rosetinted: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Droopsy Posted July 16, 2007 Share Posted July 16, 2007 i don't know what it is , I mean my sister gets bullie , but she dresses like everyone else but she's smart , and sh's ADORABLE ! now can anyone tell me why she is bullied? jealousy, nothing else:mf_rosetinted: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xxprincesschezzaxx Posted July 16, 2007 Share Posted July 16, 2007 jealousy, nothing else:mf_rosetinted: i no yh aint that sposed to be what most bullying is about? x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
buttnugget040 Posted July 16, 2007 Share Posted July 16, 2007 jealousy, nothing else:mf_rosetinted: yeah probably ...I used to get made fun of because my hair is curly and thick and everyoen in my class had thin straight hair...kinda weird aye? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Droopsy Posted July 16, 2007 Share Posted July 16, 2007 i no yh aint that sposed to be what most bullying is about? x jep, that's what 'they' say but i actually don't really believe that... okay in some cases it's like that, but for bullying i don't see jealousy as the main factor... --------------------------------------------------- I think it's....... FEAR Let's look at it for a moment: being bullied cause you're a 'geek' --> people are afraid of your smartness and are aware of the fact that they aren't as smart as you being bullied cause you're different (clothes, music, style, way of acting...) --> it's common knowledge that people fear the unpredicted, things that aren't 'the way they have to be', people fear things/people that are unknown, stuff they don't get being bullied cause you are great --> fear of your greatness:mf_rosetinted: --------------------------------------- I mean, for me it's all about FEAR Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mellody Posted July 16, 2007 Share Posted July 16, 2007 oho! so you have the same! thank god, i almost felt weird for being this way... how do you think it is that we're like that? idk, for me i think it might be from the time when i got bullied. at elementary school i didn't mind being in a group, actually i loved being the entertainer for the whole group (ie class), which some liked, but others didn't (esp. the teachers ) - so that was what made me the outsider there. everyone (teachers, parents, other students) told me all the time that i shouldn't be the way i am, and so when i got to grammar school i stopped doing the things i was criticized for (like always trying to be the centre of attention) but still was the outsider. so i made the experience that somehow no way i behaved in a group was right, so it's not a surprise to me that i don't feel comfortable being in groups now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
buttnugget040 Posted July 16, 2007 Share Posted July 16, 2007 jep, that's what 'they' say but i actually don't really believe that... okay in some cases it's like that, but for bullying i don't see jealousy as the main factor... --------------------------------------------------- I think it's....... FEAR Let's look at it for a moment: being bullied cause you're a 'geek' --> people are afraid of your smartness and are aware of the fact that they aren't as smart as you being bullied cause you're different (clothes, music, style, way of acting...) --> it's common knowledge that people fear the unpredicted, things that aren't 'the way they have to be', people fear things/people that are unknown, stuff they don't get being bullied cause you are great --> fear of your greatness:mf_rosetinted: --------------------------------------- I mean, for me it's all about FEAR yeah ....that does make sense......people probably bullied mika because he had a better personalit than they ever would have and he was probably unpredictable ....that makes so much sense Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Droopsy Posted July 16, 2007 Share Posted July 16, 2007 idk, for me i think it might be from the time when i got bullied. at elementary school i didn't mind being in a group, actually i loved being the entertainer for the whole group (ie class), which some liked, but others didn't (esp. the teachers ) - so that was what made me the outsider there. everyone (teachers, parents, other students) told me all the time that i shouldn't be the way i am, and so when i got to grammar school i stopped doing the things i was criticized for (like always trying to be the centre of attention) but still was the outsider. so i made the experience that somehow no way i behaved in a group was right, so it's not a surprise to me that i don't feel comfortable being in groups now. wow, that's a very good analysis! well, it's a start at least that you know why it is... i don't have a clue yet I maybe think because I wasn't really raised socially... I was/am always alone at home, parents away all the time, have to do everything myself, am very independent and even like it that way. I also have agoraphobia in the way that I can't stand to be in crowds or places with lots of people. I actually really enjoy the most, when after an evening out, I can come home and have piece and quiet and privacy... I actually like being alone a bit... Being with a bunch of people is way to chaotic... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sesil17aa Posted July 16, 2007 Share Posted July 16, 2007 totally the same for me...I mostly just standing with my friends... sometimes of course i talk, mostly with ONE person at a time... but I dunno, i kinda feel like, well, whatever I'll say will be ignored so.... well because it's mostly the case, when i say something it's: 'oh, hmm' and they start talking about something else so yeah, there u go:mf_rosetinted: I'm also sometimes confused that people's attitude towards me is so ... cold. I know many people who are quite indifferent and still people come to them and want to make friends, but in my case, when I'm indifferent, I'm ignored, when I try to make friends, people are polite but cool. Don't get it because I don't think that something is so wrong with me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Droopsy Posted July 16, 2007 Share Posted July 16, 2007 yeah ....that does make sense......people probably bullied mika because he had a better personalit than they ever would have and he was probably unpredictable ....that makes so much sense yeah I think so... FEAR is the answer to everything! well that and LOVE of course:biggrin2: No just kidding, but it is known in the human sciences world (yeah i'm in that workfield so...) that fear is one of the deepest and most important feelings of a human being, so you can blame fear for a lot of things which actually don't seem like fear at the surface:mf_rosetinted: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
buttnugget040 Posted July 16, 2007 Share Posted July 16, 2007 wow, that's a very good analysis! well, it's a start at least that you know why it is... i don't have a clue yet I maybe think because I wasn't really raised socially... I was/am always alone at home, parents away all the time, have to do everything myself, am very independent and even like it that way. I also have agoraphobia in the way that I can't stand to be in crowds or places with lots of people. I actually really enjoy the most, when after an evening out, I can come home and have piece and quiet and privacy... I actually like being alone a bit... Being with a bunch of people is way to chaotic... yeah I get that way ...I can't be around a lot of people either , but for a different reason , I'm closterophobic , or however you spell it ......I started hyperventilating in the crazy maze at the skating rink once , I think there were like 10 people surrounding me ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Romy Posted July 16, 2007 Share Posted July 16, 2007 Well...do u want to know the truth??I really think that people who mock another person are very stupid and ignorant and that in their lifes they have nothing to do..'till my 13 years I was(with another 2 friends)ignored..and like u said I don't know why..I was the 1st of the class,and I was also nice,but the classmates are all snob and stupid...they interested only to mode,to be the 'best'...but they were NOTHING...and finally one day I said to me:"Romy...who loves you,follows u...u don't need to stay with people like that,'coz u aren't like them...u r better..."and so I did...I was really proud of me,'coz weren't they that ignore me,but it was me...I ignored them...and now...I'm 15 years old...I have a lot of friends,all talk with me,all laugh with me...so what was the problem??Not me...but they...and If u really want to be rispected u can do it...u musn't be afraid to say in front of a silly face who mock u:"How dare??Take a look in ur mirror,mr.(or miss)sympathy..."u can do it..DON'T BE SCARY...coz u and only u are in control of ur life..byyyeeee!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sesil17aa Posted July 16, 2007 Share Posted July 16, 2007 wow, that's a very good analysis! I maybe think because I wasn't really raised socially... I was/am always alone at home, parents away all the time, have to do everything myself, am very independent and even like it that way. I also have agoraphobia in the way that I can't stand to be in crowds or places with lots of people. I actually really enjoy the most, when after an evening out, I can come home and have piece and quiet and privacy... I actually like being alone a bit... Being with a bunch of people is way to chaotic... The same for me. I was very often alone when child, I also didn't go to kindergarten. I guess when I started attending school other kids thought that I'm weird because I wasn't very chatty and liked to do everything by myself. I remember that when was a kid I was very fond of playing with dolls by myself, dreaming and making up mystical detective stories in which action took place in my garden. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mad_about_mika-89 Posted July 16, 2007 Share Posted July 16, 2007 i no longer go to school, im too old lol, but i used to be a reject. What do you mean you are too old? I looked at your public profile and you have the same age as i do, 17 that is. In my country at 17 you are in highschool Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Droopsy Posted July 16, 2007 Share Posted July 16, 2007 I'm also sometimes confused that people's attitude towards me is so ... cold. I know many people who are quite indifferent and still people come to them and want to make friends, but in my case, when I'm indifferent, I'm ignored, when I try to make friends, people are polite but cool. Don't get it because I don't think that something is so wrong with me. yeah isn't that the hardest though? Not knowing WHY it is that people see you as being so different? Okay If I compare myself to my friends, looks-wise the only difference is that I'm a big girl, and my friends are all size zero's... But other than that.. It's not like I'm a monster or anything... Looking at personality... well not to sound overconfident, but I am a sweet girl... I do a lot for people, I REALLY listen to people, and I've gotten that compliment many times, I really try to do what's good but I dunno, it's the group thing, I'm not comfortable that way... I did have some very bad experiences a few years back, and since then all the problems actually started.. before that I was a cheerful girl but those things really broke me down inside and since then I wasn't happy/chatty/talky anymore. Maybe it had a bigger impact on me then I know? And people kinda notice that impact or something? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mellody Posted July 16, 2007 Share Posted July 16, 2007 .and If u really want to be rispected u can do it...u musn't be afraid to say in front of a silly face who mock u:"How dare??Take a look in ur mirror,mr.(or miss)sympathy..."u can do it..DON'T BE SCARY...coz u and only u are in control of ur life..byyyeeee!!!!! well that's easily said, but do that in a whole group of bullies and they'll just laugh at you and bully you even more because you dare speaking your mind. believe me, i've tried. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
buttnugget040 Posted July 16, 2007 Share Posted July 16, 2007 so.....how is everyone today? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Romy Posted July 16, 2007 Share Posted July 16, 2007 I'm not saying that it's easy,but what do you solve shutting ur mouth??If u want to do smt 4 u,u have to do it...what I'm trying to say is that If you continue to suffer other people still thinking that u are not brave and that u suffer all 'coz u r afraid of them...I passed it too,and I know that If u say smt in front of them,they say:'uuu...excuse me,I was joking..hahaha..."So..I started to tell him bad words and that they are only ignorant people...U can believe me or not,but slowly slowly I was respected...and nobody said things on me anymore...my mum teach me to not suffer,'coz If they think u are weak they continue...really...u have to try,'coz u don't lose nothing... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mellody Posted July 16, 2007 Share Posted July 16, 2007 I'm not saying that it's easy,but what do you solve shutting ur mouth??If u want to do smt 4 u,u have to do it...what I'm trying to say is that If you continue to suffer other people still thinking that u are not brave and that u suffer all 'coz u r afraid of them...I passed it too,and I know that If u say smt in front of them,they say:'uuu...excuse me,I was joking..hahaha..."So..I started to tell him bad words and that they are only ignorant people...U can believe me or not,but slowly slowly I was respected...and nobody said things on me anymore...my mum teach me to not suffer,'coz If they think u are weak they continue...really...u have to try,'coz u don't lose nothing... well, good that it helped for you, as i said for me it didn't. i'm certainly no one who doesn't fight back, just lets everything happen and quietly suffers, but i couldn't keep cool and started shouting and getting emotional about it and with this even gave them more reason to bully me. and getting emotional when i'm angry is just the way i am, can't help it. i don't get bullied anymore now either, but it's not that people like me more now, they just don't behave in a childish way anymore. so now it's talking behind my back and just generally making me feel unwanted in really subtle ways. it isn't as bad as the bullying but it still hurts and i don't know what i can do about it because there is no "proof", no attacks you can fight back. i'm sorry i don't wanna attack you but just so you know where i'm coming from, it really annoys me when someone says "oh you don't have to be bullied, you can change it!", because that's just not true, at least not for everyone. but it's of course good for you that you got rid of the bullying this way, and it might help some people if they just fight back, but not everyone. you're right in the way that it's worth a try and that just shutting up isn't always the best solution either. i just disagree that you sell this as THE solution to bullying, as it isn't. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Milou Posted July 16, 2007 Share Posted July 16, 2007 A while ago I wanted to block all the negative people out of my life, and I was SO happy. But you can't keep on doing that, because I still saw them everyday.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Romy Posted July 16, 2007 Share Posted July 16, 2007 Well...don't worry!!! I'm really sorry 4 u..the fact is that I hate people like that and I only tried to get a 'solution',but I can understand that not all can do it...well...!!!!!!!!!! Now...stop it!!Let's think to beautiful things...let's think to Mika,4 example!!lool!! Bye...and sorry again If I said smt wrong!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lazy_daisy Posted July 16, 2007 Share Posted July 16, 2007 When I was in school, I was kind of the kid that no one would pay any attention at all to. I could honestly go through an entire semester in a classroom with the same kids and by the end of the semester, some people still would not know my name. I would always be picked last for everything, or not picked at all. God! That's so familiar to me! I've always been completely ignored by people. I was nice (or so I thought at the time) but they just kept excluding me from parties and things like that. For years, I was laughed at because I used to dress somewhat childlike... or so they said. As far as I'm concerned, my clothes were just fine. The fact is I didn't want to be like the rest of them; I was sick of pretending to be something I was not. So I just gave it up. I stopped trying to make them like me and kept myself to myself until I finished school. Now I'm at the university; I put all that behind me. But I carry the same sadness with me and I don't really like being around people. I was hurt long enough and I don't think I can stand it anymore. At the moment, I don't have a single true friend in the world. Of course, I have people with whom I hang around and all (you just need to talk to somebody). But they just desert me when I'm sad or when I'm in trouble. I doubt you can call that 'friends'. I had only one friend in my entire life: her name was Ana and she was from Chile. But she was with me a couple of years and then left. We wrote to each other, at first, but then we lost contact. I miss her a lot and I wish she was here, because I really need her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hannah Posted July 16, 2007 Share Posted July 16, 2007 What do you mean you are too old? I looked at your public profile and you have the same age as i do, 17 that is. In my country at 17 you are in highschool I think that in the UK you can finish school at 16 and begin college. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Em' Posted July 16, 2007 Share Posted July 16, 2007 I used to be bullied when I was young. I was redhead, with glasses and overweight... I also was very lively but was living in a posh town (Versailles - French people you will know what I mean) where people behave and are quiet (no kidding). So my liveliness was bothering people... So I just didn't belong. Funny, now many of my friends like me BECAUSE I'm lively. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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