Jump to content

The Joke Thread (tm)


bambam

Recommended Posts

Hi everyone! Thought it would be a good idea to make a joke thread. Anyone reading this, please post any goods jokes you have, nothing too mature plz...

 

-The Grandfather Clock-

 

A man walked out of an antique shop with a grandfather clock, bumped into another man and the clock falls down and smashes on the ground. The first man says, 'Why don't you watch where you're going?' The second man says, 'Why don't you carry a wristwatch like everyone else?' :roftl:

 

Dont hesitate to enter a joke, I'm sure everyone as well as me would love to hear them! :thumb_yello:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Replies 6
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Top Posters In This Topic

I think this one's okay:

 

A penguin walks into the bar wearing a bow tie. At the bar there is a bowl of nuts. The bowl of nuts says, 'What a nice bow tie!'

'Why thankyou!' says the penguin.

Later the penguin goes into the toilet. In the toilet there is a condom machine. The condom machine laughs at his bow tie.

The penguin is offended, so he complains to the bar man.

'The condom machine laughed at my bow tie,' says the penguin.

'Why, I'm sorry,' says the barman, 'The nuts are complimentry but the condom machine is out of order.'

 

:roftl:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think this one's okay:

 

A penguin walks into the bar wearing a bow tie. At the bar there is a bowl of nuts. The bowl of nuts says, 'What a nice bow tie!'

'Why thankyou!' says the penguin.

Later the penguin goes into the toilet. In the toilet there is a condom machine. The condom machine laughs at his bow tie.

The penguin is offended, so he complains to the bar man.

'The condom machine laughed at my bow tie,' says the penguin.

'Why, I'm sorry,' says the barman, 'The nuts are complimentry but the condom machine is out of order.'

 

:roftl:

 

:naughty: :naughty:

 

i can never remember jokes.....

 

wot was yours again:wink2:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 3 weeks later...

Miss Beatrice, the church organist, was in her eighties and had never been

married. She was admired for her sweetness and kindness to all.

 

One afternoon the pastor came to call on her and she showed him into her quaint sitting room. She invited him to have a seat while she prepared tea. As he sat facing her old Hammond organ, the young minister noticed a cut-glass bowl sitting on top of it. The bowl was filled with water, and in the water floated, of all things, a condom!

 

When she returned with tea and scones, they began to chat. The pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water and its strange floater, but soon it got the better of him and He could no longer resist.

 

"Miss Beatrice", he said, "I wonder if you would tell me about this?" pointing to the bowl.

 

"Oh, yes," she replied, "Isn't it wonderful? I was walking through the park a few months ago and I found this little package on the ground. The directions said to place it on the organ, keep it wet and that it would prevent the spread of disease. Do you know I haven't had the flu all winter."

 

:biggrin2: :biggrin2:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 9 years later...

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

Privacy Policy