How do you feel right now? part 4

[Mikasister]

6 hours ago, Poisonyoulove said:

I feel a bit drunk right now.  

I've been dealing with so much lately. My mom, (who is elderly and disabled, I'm her caretaker) has been in and out of the hospital and I'm worried about her health.  And I'm having vision problems, I have retinopathy and the treatment is medicine injected in the eye, which is pretty much my worst nightmare come to life. I have to do it again next week. One of my cats died last autumn and I'm still not over it.  I've lost touch with most of my friends, and those who are left are so busy so I don't even really have anybody I can moan to... hence this post. Sorry to dump this on you all, who don't really know me... I just needed to talk I guess

 

Hugs and kisses 

[Mika Cherry]

im in a mix of excited and sleepy 

[crazyaboutmika]

2 hours ago, Mika Cherry said:

im in a mix of excited and sleepy 

Good to see you back and happy Mika will visit you guys soon

Get in touch with @Sonelle

[Starlight]

I'm feeling great because today I found someone back of whom I thought I had lost.  this is a wonderful feeling.

Edited December 13, 2019 by Starlight

[Mika Cherry]

9 hours ago, crazyaboutmika said:

Good to see you back and happy Mika will visit you guys soon

Get in touch with @Sonelle

Im happy to be back i didnt realise how much i miss it here~ how have you been??

That was one of the first things i did  

[crazyaboutmika]

On 12/14/2019 at 4:50 AM, Mika Cherry said:

Im happy to be back i didnt realise how much i miss it here~ how have you been??

That was one of the first things i did  

MFC has been quiet but with Mika's new album and new tour,  we're all busy and happy again

Have lots of fun with Mika

[Irem Aytepe]

I feel so teenage! Complicated, confusion,unidentified 

[crazyaboutmika]

On 12/17/2019 at 9:43 PM, Irem Aytepe said:

I feel so teenage! Complicated, confusion,unidentified 

As time goes by things will get better Irem   Big hugs and lots of love to you

[Joey Bennett]

Feeling stressed and depressed.  Got laid off from work.  I’ve been developing feelings for a missionary at my church and I don’t know if I should tell him.

[BeccaStardust]

A bit lonely and a bit stressed

My dads gone to his girlfriend for a few days So I'm home alone 

after yesterday with the 1h 1/2 wait for a taxi I didn't really want to go out today

But Him being away just makes me relies that I have nothing to do up here, had a chat with my friends but wish I could see them more. 

 I try and do for Voice chats either on Discord or spaces on twitter but no one joins. I do this just cause I like chatting with and getting to know people who have similar interests 

 

as for the stress I've been trying to log in to all the work systems  so that I can complete the documents and also book days off Naimly my birthday/graduation in April and Mika in July but none of them seem to be working and I don't know what I'm doing wrong and its worrying me. 

I think its mainly the loneliness cause Id be able to ask my dad for help with the tech stuff when he's back on Tuesday.

 

sorry for the long vent

Edited January 29, 2022 by BeccaStardust

[silver]

1 hour ago, BeccaStardust said:

A bit lonely and a bit stressed

My dads gone to his girlfriend for a few days So I'm home alone 

after yesterday with the 1h 1/2 wait for a taxi I didn't really want to go out today

But Him being away just makes me relies that I have nothing to do up here, had a chat with my friends but wish I could see them more. 

 I try and do for Voice chats either on Discord or spaces on twitter but no one joins. I do this just cause I like chatting with and getting to know people who have similar interests 

 

as for the stress I've been trying to log in to all the work systems  so that I can complete the documents and also book days off Naimly my birthday/graduation in April and Mika in July but none of them seem to be working and I don't know what I'm doing wrong and its worrying me. 

I think its mainly the loneliness cause Id be able to ask my dad for help with the tech stuff when he's back on Tuesday.

 

sorry for the long vent

 

You could look at time alone as time to indulge yourself - have a long bath, eat what you like when you like, read a book, binge watch a box set - there's no-one to stop you   And weather permitting, go for a long walk.

 

As for your work systems, do you not have an IT support section that you can call?  And there's always the possibility that the system is down for maintenance or a software upload, so that's why you can't log in.

 

And you can always chat to us

[Lulul]

I was having an existential crisis about getting a job. I was thinking "I'm in my twenties and I still don't have a real job" but at the same time I didn't want to, cause a lot of things about it makes me anxious.

So, I spent a few days constantly feeling down (which is weird of me), and feeling like i was running out of time (not true). The good thing about it is that I was able to enjoy other sad Mika songs I didn't like so much before.

Now I'm fine, I remembered i can bake and cook many things and i can try to work on my own. Yes, it's harder, but you can make your own rules. let's see how it goes.

[TinyLove_CJ]

16 minutes ago, Lulul said:

I was having an existential crisis about getting a job. I was thinking "I'm in my twenties and I still don't have a real job" but at the same time I didn't want to, cause a lot of things about it makes me anxious.

I thought I was the only one that thought like this!!!

 

I often get really down about not having a real job yet and I just wish someone out there would give me a chance and hire me. 

 

But like you said, you can make your own rules and I'm trying harder this year to work towards my goal of being self employed!

[teenagedreamer98]

57 minutes ago, Lulul said:

I was having an existential crisis about getting a job. I was thinking "I'm in my twenties and I still don't have a real job" but at the same time I didn't want to, cause a lot of things about it makes me anxious.

So, I spent a few days constantly feeling down (which is weird of me), and feeling like i was running out of time (not true). The good thing about it is that I was able to enjoy other sad Mika songs I didn't like so much before.

Now I'm fine, I remembered i can bake and cook many things and i can try to work on my own. Yes, it's harder, but you can make your own rules. let's see how it goes.

 

36 minutes ago, TinyLove_CJ said:

I thought I was the only one that thought like this!!!

 

I often get really down about not having a real job yet and I just wish someone out there would give me a chance and hire me. 

 

But like you said, you can make your own rules and I'm trying harder this year to work towards my goal of being self employed!

 

I relate to you both so much!  Although I currently have a part-time freelance job, I've been looking for something full-time since I left college in 2018.  Countless applications later, I'm still looking.  Good to know I'm not alone!

 

My family are moving house soon to an area where there are more job opportunities, so hopefully this will help me in my search.  What I really want to do is become a novelist some day, but it would be nice to get a full-time job to help pay the bills in the meantime.

 

Hope you can both achieve your goals of self-employment! 

[BeccaStardust]

1 hour ago, silver said:

 

You could look at time alone as time to indulge yourself - have a long bath, eat what you like when you like, read a book, binge watch a box set - there's no-one to stop you   And weather permitting, go for a long walk.

 

As for your work systems, do you not have an IT support section that you can call?  And there's always the possibility that the system is down for maintenance or a software upload, so that's why you can't log in.

 

And you can always chat to us

well for starts I don't have a bath but as for eating yes I have been

I've been re watching Casa Mika today

Its quite windy here today but if its better tomorrow I might go to town/park which is only 5 mins 

There probably is IT support but I've been there two weeks so Idk who to contact other then my direct boss(or her boss)

 

Yeah I want to chat more here but feel I don't know where If I just want to say hi and not a specific topic as much as I like talking here I do sometimes get lost as where to go for things 

 

 

1 hour ago, Lulul said:

I was having an existential crisis about getting a job. I was thinking "I'm in my twenties and I still don't have a real job" but at the same time I didn't want to, cause a lot of things about it makes me anxious.

So, I spent a few days constantly feeling down (which is weird of me), and feeling like i was running out of time (not true). The good thing about it is that I was able to enjoy other sad Mika songs I didn't like so much before.

Now I'm fine, I remembered i can bake and cook many things and i can try to work on my own. Yes, it's harder, but you can make your own rules. let's see how it goes.

I understand this so much  I'm 22 (23 in april) finished uni two years ago and while I had a theme park job last year I knew I was moving so it wasn't permanent and now am only on a 6 month contract so have no idea what i'll do after that

My industry isn't really hiring (Restaurant being hit bad by covid) plus I don't even know if I want to do Hospitality still and partly feel like I've wasted my whole time at uni if I don't want to do that anymore (I kinda do but prefer the people side now to cooking)

[TinyLove_CJ]

13 hours ago, teenagedreamer98 said:

What I really want to do is become a novelist some day,

Same here! Writing is HARD though!

I've been working on my horror story since 2017 and I'm still not done 😅

 

I'd love to share more about my interests in reading/writing online, but I haven't come across any discussion or forum based websites that are suitable for what I'm looking for.

 

13 hours ago, BeccaStardust said:

partly feel like I've wasted my whole time at uni

I can slightly relate to this. I don't regret going to uni, it has taught me some essential skills, but I sometimes wonder why I went through so many years of higher education only to come out and graduate without getting a job in the industry I'm interested in.

 

My uni years were some of the hardest I've ever been through, I feel like I should surely have something to show for all that hard work by now 😕

 

I can also relate to the loneliness. It really hits me hard some days how lonely I can be. I don't have many friends outside of online groups. I can count my school friends I've kept in touch with just on one hand. Doesn't help that with my anxiety I'm not that great at making friends anyway 🙃. 

 

I can feel differently in certain situations though, which is a little strange I guess. I can be in a room full of people and feel like the only one there or I can be home alone and feel fine.

 

I really want to get better at getting to know people too though, and I am happy to talk to anyone as long as they're friendly!

 

I am working on a Mika related project which I'm hoping to share soon, and it might actually help with getting to know more fans. We shall see....

[BeccaStardust]

1 minute ago, TinyLove_CJ said:

Same here! Writing is HARD though!

I've been working on my horror story since 2017 and I'm still not done 😅

 

I'd love to share more about my interests in reading/writing online, but I haven't come across any discussion or forum based websites that are suitable for what I'm looking for.

 

I can slightly relate to this. I don't regret going to uni, it has taught me some essential skills, but I sometimes wonder why I went through so many years of higher education only to come out and graduate without getting a job in the industry I'm interested in.

 

My uni years were some of the hardest I've ever been through, I feel like I should surely have something to show for all that hard work by now 😕

 

I can also relate to the loneliness. It really hits me hard some days how lonely I can be. I don't have many friends outside of online groups. I can count my school friends I've kept in touch with just on one hand. Doesn't help that with my anxiety I'm not that great at making friends anyway 🙃. 

 

I can feel differently in certain situations though, which is a little strange I guess. I can be in a room full of people and feel like the only one there or I can be home alone and feel fine.

 

I really want to get better at getting to know people too though, and I am happy to talk to anyone as long as they're friendly!

 

I am working on a Mika related project which I'm hoping to share soon, and it might actually help with getting to know more fans. We shall see....

You could always create a writing topic here for aspiring writers (if there isn’t one already )

I’d be interested I want to start writing more outside of s**tty stuff I write now 

 

 

i don't regret uni as a whole but I do wonder if I would have done better at a different course or even uni 

but I don’t think anything would have changed in the basic terms of why I hated it

annoying flat mates first year (maybe preventable )

Parents divorce second year gave me a lotta stress  (yeah would probally have happened wherever) 

and then covid third year.

yeah I can agree about friends on one hand I only really have 3 one of which I feel like I’m drifting away from 

[TinyLove_CJ]

3 minutes ago, BeccaStardust said:

You could always create a writing topic here for aspiring writers (if there isn’t one already )

I have thought about this, but before now I've not been too sure how much interest it would get. Maybe I should just open a new thread anyway? 🤔

[Aki Celeste]

5 minutes ago, TinyLove_CJ said:

I have thought about this, but before now I've not been too sure how much interest it would get. Maybe I should just open a new thread anyway? 🤔

 

You totally should! Towards the end of last year I was thinking of opening a thread with writing prompts, using Mika's songs initially (although of course we could go broader than that). I did start a "Poetic resistance" thread recently, which might be another way to put something out there.  Whatever you feel like doing, couldn't hurt to give it a try!

[BeccaStardust]

update on the tech issues ive managed to log into 2/3 of the sites and completed all the training so thats good

 

[Aki Celeste]

14 hours ago, teenagedreamer98 said:

 

 

I relate to you both so much!  Although I currently have a part-time freelance job, I've been looking for something full-time since I left college in 2018.  Countless applications later, I'm still looking.  Good to know I'm not alone!

 

My family are moving house soon to an area where there are more job opportunities, so hopefully this will help me in my search.  What I really want to do is become a novelist some day, but it would be nice to get a full-time job to help pay the bills in the meantime.

 

Hope you can both achieve your goals of self-employment! 

 

I just want to say, all of you are not alone or weird for experiencing this! Even though I'm no longer in my twenties and technically have a full-time "real" job, I can see so much of myself in these comments. I enjoyed my university years to a certain extent but didn't come out of it with a lot of friends or job opportunities in the field I studied (French language and literature with an informal English minor, as I took a ton of literature and creative writing classes).

 

I wouldn't say I felt I had found a "real" job until I got into my late twenties or early thirties even, and it was in a completely different field. I'm pretty content with where I'm at now, COVID challenges notwithstanding, but I can empathize with those of you who are still in the emerging phase and figuring out what direction you want to go in. I hate to say it, but for many of us, the search never ends (or at least it hasn't for me!). Even while I'm working a full-time job, I still have dreams of being a writer myself and am slowly figuring out ways to cultivate the possibility of it becoming a reality.

 

44 minutes ago, TinyLove_CJ said:

I'd love to share more about my interests in reading/writing online, but I haven't come across any discussion or forum based websites that are suitable for what I'm looking for.

 

I've been having this issue too. I've tried a few different things - posting and commenting on a fanfiction website, looking for pen pals who also write, and signing up for Zoom writer's workshops, mainly - but there don't seem to be a lot of options for forum-based discussion, like you said. In your ideal scenario, what would suit your needs? Sometimes I find it helps to write that out for myself.

 

Anyway, sorry to jump in on this thread like this, it just happens to touch upon a topic I've been wrestling with for a while myself. The most I've been able to do over the past year are short group writing exercises and writing fanfiction stories, which is not exactly what I want to do long-term, lol. I'm telling myself it's a temporary way to get my writing juices flowing, before I get to the real stuff.

 

@BeccaStardust I'm curious to know what type of writing you enjoy doing? Glad to hear that the tech issues are starting to resolve themselves.  

Edited January 30, 2022 by Aki Celeste

[BeccaStardust]

Just now, Aki Celeste said:

 

You're not alone or weird for experiencing this! Even though I'm no longer in my twenties and technically have a full-time "real" job, I can see so much of myself in these comments. I enjoyed my university years to a certain extent but didn't come out of it with a lot of friends or job opportunities in the field I studied (French language and literature with an informal English minor, as I took a ton of literature and creative writing classes).

 

I wouldn't say I felt I had found a "real" job until I got into my late twenties or early thirties even, and it was in a completely different field. I'm pretty content with where I'm at now, COVID challenges notwithstanding, but I can empathize with those of you who are still in the emerging phase and figuring out what direction you want to go in. I hate to say it, but for many of us, the search never ends (or at least it hasn't for me!). Even while I'm working a full-time job, I still have dreams of being a writer myself and am slowly figuring out ways to cultivate the possibility of it becoming a reality.

 

 

I've been having this issue too. I've tried a few different things - posting and commenting on a fanfiction website, looking for pen pals who also write, and signing up for Zoom writer's workshops, mainly - but there don't seem to be a lot of options for forum-based discussion, like you said. In your ideal scenario, what would suit your needs? Sometimes I find it helps to write that out for myself.

 

Anyway, sorry to jump in on this thread like this, it just happens to touch upon a topic I've been wrestling with for a while myself. The most I've been able to do over the past year are short group writing exercises and writing fanfiction stories, which is not exactly what I want to do long-term, lol. I'm telling myself it's a temporary way to get my writing juices flowing, before I get to the real stuff.

 

@BeccaStardust I'm curious to know what type of writing you enjoy doing? Glad to hear that the tech issues are starting to resolve themselves.  

I only really Write fanfiction currently but do want to expand out to actually create characters and my own ideas which is something I used to do more in the past but stopped for some reason 

my main genres would be Sci-Fi/Fantasy. I've also written kidnapping a few times in te past (Idk how worried about myself i should about myself there)

I do like writing stuff about finding your path/place 

 

I used to have a really good book about writing fiction I don't remember if i still have it or if I got rid of it.

[Aki Celeste]

16 minutes ago, BeccaStardust said:

I only really Write fanfiction currently but do want to expand out to actually create characters and my own ideas which is something I used to do more in the past but stopped for some reason 

my main genres would be Sci-Fi/Fantasy. I've also written kidnapping a few times in te past (Idk how worried about myself i should about myself there)

I do like writing stuff about finding your path/place 

 

I used to have a really good book about writing fiction I don't remember if i still have it or if I got rid of it.

 

I'm on the fanfiction boat myself, although it's gradually winding down (I wrote mostly fanfiction throughout 2021 and it saved me from going completely nuts, NGL). Writing your own stuff is MUCH harder, so no judgement there. Sometimes you just have to be in the right place mentally and emotionally to get your own characters and ideas moving on the page.

 

It's interesting to hear that you write about kidnapping, etc. I feel like a lot of darker material isn't necessarily a reflection of your own experience or mental state, as a way to explore the suffering of others. I find that it develops empathy or more understanding sometimes, although I suppose it could become excessive, like anything can.

 

If you remember which book about writing you had, def post. Some books I've enjoyed in the past are Stephen King's On Writing and Natalie Goldberg's Writing Down the Bones, but it's been a while since I've read anything about the craft of writing. Didn't Philip Pullman and Neil Gaiman also put out books on writing, if you're more interested in the fantasy genre?

[BeccaStardust]

1 minute ago, Aki Celeste said:

 

I'm on the fanfiction boat myself, although it's gradually winding down (I wrote mostly fanfiction throughout 2021 and it saved me from going completely nuts, NGL). Writing your own stuff is MUCH harder, so no judgement there. Sometimes you just have to be in the right place mentally and emotionally to get your own characters and ideas moving on the page.

 

It's interesting to hear that you write about kidnapping, etc. I feel like a lot of darker material isn't necessarily a reflection of your own experience or mental state, as a way to explore the suffering of others. I find that it develops empathy or more understanding sometimes, although I suppose it could become excessive, like anything can.

 

If you remember which book about writing you had, def post. Some books I've enjoyed in the past are Stephen King's On Writing and Natalie Goldberg's Writing Down the Bones, but it's been a while since I've read anything about the craft of writing. Didn't Philip Pullman and Neil Gaiman also put out books on writing, if you're more interested in the fantasy genre?

I wrote a lot when I was in school then kinda stopped with how busy I was at uni but then last year I got back to writing again 

i rarely finish stuff that’s the other issue I have even tho I normally plan the whole thing out 

 

i always try try and do some research for stuff if it’s a topic I don’t know as even with fantasy and I don’t want to get things wrong if I can help it 

 

i remember it it was dark blue and I think simply called a guide to writing adult fiction or something it was quite intreasting my parents got it for me when I was a lot more interested in writing 

I’ll look into the ones you said 

[Aki Celeste]

9 minutes ago, BeccaStardust said:

I wrote a lot when I was in school then kinda stopped with how busy I was at uni but then last year I got back to writing again 

i rarely finish stuff that’s the other issue I have even tho I normally plan the whole thing out 

 

i always try try and do some research for stuff if it’s a topic I don’t know as even with fantasy and I don’t want to get things wrong if I can help it 

 

Yup, that was pretty much what happened to me, although I eventually started taking creative writing classes in my later uni years. There was a good long gap of about 12 years before I started writing again with any consistency. I tell myself that I was just collecting life experience though, so I could have something to write about. 

 

Completing stories can be hard, which is why I like to have at least one or two writer friends around who can inspire me to get the dang thing finished. That being said, I have documents and notebooks filled with ideas that I never fleshed out, so maybe it just comes with the territory? I do enjoy the research part of it though, especially when I write about places or time periods that I'm not so familiar with.

 

When all is said and done, I think as long as we're maintaining a curious mind about the world and writing at least SOMETHING down every now and then, no need to beat ourselves up about not finishing every project we start. But maybe I'm setting the bar too low...