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..it Happens!


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I found something really funny and I want to share it with you!! :naughty: It's quite long but they are all funny!!


Capitalism: Make hay while the ..it happens. The more ..it, the more profit.

Communism: Equal ..it happens to all people. We must work for our collective ..it.

Socialism: If ..it happens, let's distribute it equally. My ..it is your ..it.

Nazism: Aryan ..it happens in the most masterly way.

Patriotism: Better ..it happens to us than to anyone else.

Conservatism: ..it doesn't happen in the good old ways it used to.

Liberalism: Let ..it alone, let ..it happen.

Commercialism: Let's package and distribute all this ..it that happens.

Scientific Obscurantism: Amorphous excrement does occur in given cases.

Relativism: ..it equals WC squared.

Darwinism: As ..it happens, only the ..ittiest survive. The principle is known as "the survival of the ..ittiest".

Historicism: The same old ..it happens again and again.

Archaeology: All we can dig is the same old ..it over and over again.

Ecology: As long as it is organic ..it that happens, it's OK.

Green Peace: Save and recycle all ..it as soon as it happens.

Classical Physics: ..it does not 'happen', it just moves around.

Quantum Physics: ..it happens but you can't say both where and when. It happens in discrete quanta called "..itons".

Holistic Physics: If ..it happens, it happens everywhere at once.

Computer Science: If ..it happens, we'll fix it in the next version.

Descartes: ..it happens, therefore I am... I ..it, therefore I am... I am, therefore ..it happens. Cogito ergo defecato...

Behaviorism: You are conditioned to having ..it happen.

Freudianism: ..it happens as an indication of your anal fixation...

Psychoanalysis: ..it happens because of your toilet training. It's all your mother's fault.

Pragmatism: If ..it happens, we'll find a way to use it.

Selfishness: Let all ..it happen to me only.

Altruism: Let all ..it happen onto others.

Pollyannaism: Oh, how happy we should all be that ..it happens to us!

Optimism: ..it knocks only once.

Pessimism: If ..it happens, there won't be enough for everybody.

Paranoia: ..it happens cuz it's a plot.

Narcissism: ..it happens in my own image.

Agnosticism: Nobody knows why ..it happens.

Gnosticism: I know why ..it happens but won't tell you.

Platonism: There is ideal ..it happening somewhere.

Stoicism: ..it happens? So?

Cynicism: Of course ..it happens.

Cubism: Why worry if ..it happens? You won't recognize it.

Cultural Relativism: ..it happens everywhere differently.

Confucionism: ..it happens to man who is not wise enough to avoid it... If ..it has to happen, let it happen properly, Grasshopper.

Zen Buddhism: If ..it happens in the forest with no one around, who will hear the sound it makes?

Hare Krishna: ..it happens Rama Rama Ding Dong.

Calvinism: ..it happens to people who don't work hard enough to avoid it.

Puritanism: S*** can happen all day as long as you don't call it that.

Judaism: Why does ..it always happen to us?

Creationism: And the Lord said "Let there be ..it" ... and there came piles of it. After six days of this ..it, He rested.

Politics: If ..it happens, make a deal with it.

Diplomacy: Let's pretend ..it doesn't happen.

Bureaucracy: I don't care if ..it happens as long as you fill out the forms.

Kindergarten Teachers: If ..it happens, don't forget to flush afterwards!

The Laundry: Sheets happen.

Nostalgia: ..it doesn't happen as often as it used to.

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