MannyCulpena Posted November 8, 2009 Share Posted November 8, 2009 Are fun? Good.....cause you'd loose! No I didint finnish the sentence for some reason They arent fun.... Well...dont think there is anything that could change my mind about this...well there is but lets be realstic...so you know it kinda upsets me hearing what you say when I know myself its not true.. so better just never get on that topic again... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
purplegrape Posted November 8, 2009 Share Posted November 8, 2009 No I didint finnish the sentence for some reasonThey arent fun.... Well...dont think there is anything that could change my mind about this...well there is but lets be realstic...so you know it kinda upsets me hearing what you say when I know myself its not true.. so better just never get on that topic again... Oh, ok. Well it upsets me that you're so negative about yourself when everything I do say is 100% true and there are so many great things about you that you refuse to see. So yes, let's not stay on this topic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MannyCulpena Posted November 8, 2009 Share Posted November 8, 2009 Oh, ok. Well it upsets me that you're so negative about yourself when everything I do say is 100% true and there are so many great things about you that you refuse to see. So yes, let's not stay on this topic. I dont refuse to see. I tried. But I cant...cuz they dont exist. I have a bad stomachache... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
purplegrape Posted November 8, 2009 Share Posted November 8, 2009 I dont refuse to see. I tried. But I cant...cuz they dont exist. I have a bad stomachache... But there's so much! Your thoughts and words and ideas and every movement you make has reason and is precious to someone or something out there and every time you speak you cause something to happen somewhere and every inhale and exhale and thought makes something happen and if these things didn't happen then other things wouldn't happen and nothing would be as it is! For you or other people! Every action is connected and I can't even begin to explain how much you've done for me by just existing! You've saved me from myself more times than you know and more times than I probably even noticed! you've been doing it all night! My seeing that you're here and simply knowing that if I decided I needed to talk to you I could has helped me fight this god damn panic attack that's still sitting just in the back of my mind and torturing me with it';s presence! you've stopped me from breaking down and giving up on everything by letting me know that there is someone out there who is like me and who does care about people like I do and who cares about me and I want nothing more than for you to understand how important you are to me even if you don't think you're important to anyone else! I want you to know that I KNOW you're beautiful and special even if you are detemined to believe otherwise! you are so much even if you belittle yourself daily and it hurts me from these many miles away to know that no matter what I do you won't see how important you are and won't see how much you've helped me and I begin feeling like a failure cause I've been unable to help you! I don't like that you look down on yourself so much because there's so many great things about you!!! *rant over* I hope you feel better Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dark Angel Posted November 8, 2009 Author Share Posted November 8, 2009 (edited) bored, freeeeezzzzzzzing my @ss off and like this sometimes Edited November 8, 2009 by Dark Angel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MannyCulpena Posted November 8, 2009 Share Posted November 8, 2009 But there's so much! Your thoughts and words and ideas and every movement you make has reason and is precious to someone or something out there and every time you speak you cause something to happen somewhere and every inhale and exhale and thought makes something happen and if these things didn't happen then other things wouldn't happen and nothing would be as it is! For you or other people! Every action is connected and I can't even begin to explain how much you've done for me by just existing! You've saved me from myself more times than you know and more times than I probably even noticed! you've been doing it all night! My seeing that you're here and simply knowing that if I decided I needed to talk to you I could has helped me fight this god damn panic attack that's still sitting just in the back of my mind and torturing me with it';s presence! you've stopped me from breaking down and giving up on everything by letting me know that there is someone out there who is like me and who does care about people like I do and who cares about me and I want nothing more than for you to understand how important you are to me even if you don't think you're important to anyone else! I want you to know that I KNOW you're beautiful and special even if you are detemined to believe otherwise! you are so much even if you belittle yourself daily and it hurts me from these many miles away to know that no matter what I do you won't see how important you are and won't see how much you've helped me and I begin feeling like a failure cause I've been unable to help you! I don't like that you look down on yourself so much because there's so many great things about you!!! *rant over* I hope you feel better You basiclly left me speachless... I don't really know what to say except that I'm really glad I helped you somehow Its not that you didint help me, don't feel like a failure, cuz you DID help me with myself alot...remember when we were talking on by PMs? I acually thought I mean something for a week...and even though its down again..something stayed...you know that little bravness... I can be myself..I can be myself since MFC but you definitely helped me as hell with acually find my real self... It is none of your blame that you can't help me with what I think about myself I've been told what am I MANY MANY times during my 14 yrs old life and i got to the point I acually realized most of it is right. If I was beautiful...someone would want me Im not either beautiful or have good character. Im not creative... I sometimes feel like I mean something, usually on tuesdays, on my way to piano..this is when I put on clothes I want, sometimes even skirts, sometimes even heels...and i feel pretty... until the next day..I get put down..and realized that last day feeling was only a dream if you know what I mean... :no:sorry..I just can't see it..I just know Im not either beautiful or anything Though Im really really glad I helped you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
purplegrape Posted November 8, 2009 Share Posted November 8, 2009 You basiclly left me speachless...I don't really know what to say except that I'm really glad I helped you somehow Its not that you didint help me, don't feel like a failure, cuz you DID help me with myself alot...remember when we were talking on by PMs? I acually thought I mean something for a week...and even though its down again..something stayed...you know that little bravness... I can be myself..I can be myself since MFC but you definitely helped me as hell with acually find my real self... It is none of your blame that you can't help me with what I think about myself I've been told what am I MANY MANY times during my 14 yrs old life and i got to the point I acually realized most of it is right. If I was beautiful...someone would want me Im not either beautiful or have good character. Im not creative... I sometimes feel like I mean something, usually on tuesdays, on my way to piano..this is when I put on clothes I want, sometimes even skirts, sometimes even heels...and i feel pretty... until the next day..I get put down..and realized that last day feeling was only a dream if you know what I mean... :no:sorry..I just can't see it..I just know Im not either beautiful or anything Though Im really really glad I helped you Ok....well....*sigh* look Justyna: I love you to death but I'm having a lot of trouble keeping myself any bit sane or at least able to function at all. I really can't deal with more on my plate right now and no matter what you say I'm going to feel as if I've failed you because I can't help you as much as I'd like to. I've always believed that the mind is extremely powerful and I truly do believe that if you listen to these horrible, worthless, f*cking bastards who tell you these god awful lies about yourself then you will (and do) believe them. I'd really like the meet all of these people who have hurt you because I would love to take out all of my frustration and anger and hate of those awful pr*cks because they've confused and wronged a wonderful person and would be lucky to only have to deal with my wrath. They'll all get theirs in the end. Karma is one thing I really do believe strongly in. They'll get there's and if we're all lucky they'll get more than that. You have done so much for me and I only wish I could return the favor with the same strength. But I think I've come to terms with the fact that you're not going to believe me no matter how many times I tell you how great you are and how beautiful...and I don't even care about your beauty! I'd feel the same if I'd never seen a picture of you because I judge on personality and if I find the personality beautiful then I find the physical just as beautiful. I'm only going to ask one thing of you: Please stop vocalizing your dislike of yourself unless you really do want me to continue telling you that you're amazing. If you do like that I tell you (and MEAN) these things then go ahead and tell me how ugly and awful you are because I'll fight a losing battle in hopes of helping at all. But above all I really want you to understand and believe that I mean what I say. I always have and always will and I won't lie. Even if you don't agree with me understand that at least what I say is my opinion and thereffore cannot be wrong. You've come to mean a lot to me and I've grown close to you even though my mind has been telling me to stay away for fear of being hurt again. I know this isn't the same situation but closeness to anyone scares the hell out of me but I've begun knocking down my wall for you and you cannot understand how hard it has been for me to do this. And I haven't even completely taken you in. Even over the internet there's a part of me that's warning me to cut you out of my life because you might f*ck me over. I really don't believe this. I trust you and I care for you. I've never regretted anything in my life and I don't want to start now. It seems this has turned into something a bit more than it started and I'm sorry but I'm just.....I'm losing it..... Love you. Hope your stomach feels better Thanks for letting me rant. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shikutukumimika Posted November 8, 2009 Share Posted November 8, 2009 like it's 4:52 am and i havn't slept. and hyper. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mikalollipop_karla Posted November 8, 2009 Share Posted November 8, 2009 happy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iadoremika Posted November 8, 2009 Share Posted November 8, 2009 Nervous/anxious. I have an essay due but I'm not sure if I submit it tomorrow or Wednesday. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SashaX Posted November 8, 2009 Share Posted November 8, 2009 Anxious...I REALLY hope that everything will work.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shikutukumimika Posted November 8, 2009 Share Posted November 8, 2009 Fxcking tired. Haven't slept all night. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MannyCulpena Posted November 8, 2009 Share Posted November 8, 2009 Ok....well....*sigh* look Justyna: I love you to death but I'm having a lot of trouble keeping myself any bit sane or at least able to function at all. I really can't deal with more on my plate right now and no matter what you say I'm going to feel as if I've failed you because I can't help you as much as I'd like to. I've always believed that the mind is extremely powerful and I truly do believe that if you listen to these horrible, worthless, f*cking bastards who tell you these god awful lies about yourself then you will (and do) believe them. I'd really like the meet all of these people who have hurt you because I would love to take out all of my frustration and anger and hate of those awful pr*cks because they've confused and wronged a wonderful person and would be lucky to only have to deal with my wrath. They'll all get theirs in the end. Karma is one thing I really do believe strongly in. They'll get there's and if we're all lucky they'll get more than that. You have done so much for me and I only wish I could return the favor with the same strength. But I think I've come to terms with the fact that you're not going to believe me no matter how many times I tell you how great you are and how beautiful...and I don't even care about your beauty! I'd feel the same if I'd never seen a picture of you because I judge on personality and if I find the personality beautiful then I find the physical just as beautiful. I'm only going to ask one thing of you: Please stop vocalizing your dislike of yourself unless you really do want me to continue telling you that you're amazing. If you do like that I tell you (and MEAN) these things then go ahead and tell me how ugly and awful you are because I'll fight a losing battle in hopes of helping at all. But above all I really want you to understand and believe that I mean what I say. I always have and always will and I won't lie. Even if you don't agree with me understand that at least what I say is my opinion and thereffore cannot be wrong. You've come to mean a lot to me and I've grown close to you even though my mind has been telling me to stay away for fear of being hurt again. I know this isn't the same situation but closeness to anyone scares the hell out of me but I've begun knocking down my wall for you and you cannot understand how hard it has been for me to do this. And I haven't even completely taken you in. Even over the internet there's a part of me that's warning me to cut you out of my life because you might f*ck me over. I really don't believe this. I trust you and I care for you. I've never regretted anything in my life and I don't want to start now. It seems this has turned into something a bit more than it started and I'm sorry but I'm just.....I'm losing it..... Love you. Hope your stomach feels better Thanks for letting me rant. Lets just end this...I really don't want to talk abut it..end..finito..no more Except one thing: I would NEVER fu*k you over! EVER! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SashaX Posted November 8, 2009 Share Posted November 8, 2009 Anxious Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dark Angel Posted November 8, 2009 Author Share Posted November 8, 2009 bored, freeeeezzzzzzzing my @ss off and like this sometimes still... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Black-Cinderella Posted November 8, 2009 Share Posted November 8, 2009 Alone, sad. but happy. (OK, I don't even understand myself) Bored. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marshmalloworld Posted November 8, 2009 Share Posted November 8, 2009 I don't understand myself either. I feel alone but I wanted so (my friends organized a games afternoon but I said no). I needed to be on my own to think about my life lol! Very deep xDDD Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dark Angel Posted November 8, 2009 Author Share Posted November 8, 2009 I don't understand myself either.I feel alone but I wanted so (my friends organized a games afternoon but I said no). I needed to be on my own to think about my life lol! Very deep xDDD Ditto. And i dont feel like talking much. Just wanna be alone to think and find myself and find out what i wanna do with life. Pretty bad timething this happens cos i have lots of things comming up i need to take care of! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dark Angel Posted November 8, 2009 Author Share Posted November 8, 2009 i think... noit sure... i hate myself for what im thinkin about buying tomorrow Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MannyCulpena Posted November 8, 2009 Share Posted November 8, 2009 i think... noit sure... i hate myself for what im thinkin about buying tomorrow DONT YOU DARE! Angel please! think i know what you want Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dark Angel Posted November 8, 2009 Author Share Posted November 8, 2009 DONT YOU DARE! Angel please! think i know what you want yeah i think you know what! And also the only one... and want it to stay that way!!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MannyCulpena Posted November 8, 2009 Share Posted November 8, 2009 yeah i think you know what! And also the only one... and want it to stay that way!!!!!! it will stay that way! of course it will! but Angel please YOU PROMISED ME! Does it mean anything to you? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dark Angel Posted November 8, 2009 Author Share Posted November 8, 2009 it will stay that way! of course it will!but Angel please YOU PROMISED ME! Does it mean anything to you? that was back before everything went wrong. I wouldnt if we were still doing the help thingy we did for only a few weeks time cos yeah i promised... but as before: that was back then. And its only maybe cos of those weeks... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MannyCulpena Posted November 8, 2009 Share Posted November 8, 2009 that was back before everything went wrong. I wouldnt if we were still doing the help thingy we did for only a few weeks time cos yeah i promised... but as before: that was back then. And its only maybe cos of those weeks... I did not end any thingy! I still want to help you! I never said I finished! I was just waiting till your stubborn days are gone As a matter of fact I wrote to you last night but you didint answear Please Angel..I still want and will help you... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
purplegrape Posted November 8, 2009 Share Posted November 8, 2009 Lets just end this...I really don't want to talk abut it..end..finito..no moreExcept one thing: I would NEVER fu*k you over! EVER! I know you wouldn't Thank you. I feel....same as yesterday. Sh*tty. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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