The doctor is in - shrinks are us...

[Shine]

I had a rather odd experience in one of the threads a few days ago, when two members were wondering whether they were the only ones there. I thought I was being polite letting them know that I was also there. My reply was followed by a long silence and then they continued as if I hadn't said anything. I didn't take it personally, but I did think it was time for me to leave the thread.

 

You've got it.

I've expereinced that situation a lot of times.

And not only me. But, as you put it smartly it's better not to take it personally. Even if it is actually.

[koolj5]

I didn't say it always happened on purpose.

But they do it very often to some people deliberately or not.

Whether they are newbies or not

I'm entitled to say that I often feel incomfortable on this thread or somewhere else...That's my genuine feeling and I won't avoid it.

 

i'm very sorry, shine, that you have felt this way on this thread. i've always thought of this thread as one where most people's posts get answered.

naturally, since it's kind of a slower thread.

otherwise i wouldn't be here, because i'm shy and i know it hurts when your post is ignored.

 

but i know it happens, maybe because there's often long breaks between posts and the times that people are actually on here together don't happen that much?

[Dreamy_Queen]

This is not easy, I know what you mean.

I always read your posts because I've always thought that you have interesting things to say, but it's like Sariflor said, when I agree I don't always quote or answer.

I count myself to the people who has obstacles, in my case with the language, which I have been nagging about through the years!

But as much as I love some of the just-fooling-around-threads I really appreciate the discussions too!

It's interesting to listen when people all around the world are explaining their point of view and I have learned so much on this forum.

In spite of my obstacle I try to participate and I really hope that you will do the same. People are mostly very nice and are doing their best to explain when you ask them something. And the ones who are not nice and tries to attack or provoke, the only way is to ignore them.

I have met some of the MFCers in real life but I'm definitely talking just as much with those I've only met in here.

 

So please don't give up!

 

 

 

 

Haha, good point, and actually very true!

I saw your complaints about your English in some different threads, but, being not a native speaker, I must say you sound quite as native!

 

I understand so well what you're saying! I'm very new to MFC and I have no friends here. Yet anyway. On the "lighter" threads there are some MFCers I have a few words now and then but nothing serious. Pic treads are fine, I often browse through these and some of the pics make me want to express my thoughts so I sometimes post these in rather lengthy letters but often it's like running head first against a brick wall.

I'm glad to see there are other people who share my thoughts. Finding your place in a community where most of the communication is, well, semi-anonymous takes time and as it happens in real life, some people just don't fit in. I won't stop writing though .

Now I have to said the things, that I have read to my address I notice your posts, especially in pics threads. It is so interesting suddenly to discover a newbie that turns out to be an ardent poster, and soon she becomes a well-known one.

Here I am with it again, BUT... I was watching an interview with MIKA today from last year and there was a line he said that to me the best summarizes what I've been wanting to answer to your question all along. I quote: „I take the personality of the Cheshire Cat. The teeth are sharp. There... I'm ready to bite, but the power is in the smile.” And so it is, see for yourself below

 

ahhhhh my favorite Mika's quote!!!!!!!!

I didn't say it always happened on purpose.

But they do it very often to some people deliberately or not.

Whether they are newbies or not

I'm entitled to say that I often feel incomfortable on this thread or somewhere else...That's my genuine feeling and I won't avoid it.

 

Bojana, you? Uncomfortable??? I always considered you a very confident and self-assured, being like a duck to water here at MFC, having your own opinion on many things and expressing it without fear. like a mama. Your post in many threads are so wise

 

I had a rather odd experience in one of the threads a few days ago, when two members were wondering whether they were the only ones there. I thought I was being polite letting them know that I was also there. My reply was followed by a long silence and then they continued as if I hadn't said anything. I didn't take it personally, but I did think it was time for me to leave the thread.

 

don't worry, it happens to me, even being in the other side. I can ask in gasmics if there anybody home, post a pic, and go away, because nobody answers in a several minutes.

 

i'm very sorry, shine, that you have felt this way on this thread. i've always thought of this thread as one where most people's posts get answered.

naturally, since it's kind of a slower thread.

otherwise i wouldn't be here, because i'm shy and i know it hurts when your post is ignored.

 

but i know it happens, maybe because there's often long breaks between posts and the times that people are actually on here together don't happen that much?

 

+1

this thread is really a kind of harbour for me

[Siu]

 

Now I have to said the things, that I have read to my address I notice your posts, especially in pics threads. It is so interesting suddenly to discover a newbie that turns out to be an ardent poster, and soon she becomes a well-known one.

 

That's right, I started off in the pics threads mostly, because this was the easy way to merge in and I'm not going to deny that some of the threads are at first rather overwhelming, if you know what I mean . I still go through these every once in a while but firstly, I rather prefer focusing on the artistic side of MIKA than on his appealing body, though I can't deny I'm fully aware of it . And secondly, I prefer discussing issues of interest rather than writing empty "wow" or "aah" comments to pictures, which I still do when I see something that really catches my eye, but increasingly less, because I've started to find other more interesting and intriguing threads in this forum, which leaves me less time to spend looking at pics.

 

ahhhhh my favorite Mika's quote!!!!!!!!

 

I hadn't seen the vid before but when I heard the lines I felt like "Hey Meeks, this IS you in just a few sentences!" Sharp but sweet. Plus it's such a cool interview, especially the end of it .

[Dreamy_Queen]

That's right, I started off in the pics threads mostly, because this was the easy way to merge in and I'm not going to deny that some of the threads are at first rather overwhelming, if you know what I mean . I still go through these every once in a while but firstly, I rather prefer focusing on the artistic side of MIKA than on his appealing body, though I can't deny I'm fully aware of it . And secondly, I prefer discussing issues of interest rather than writing empty "wow" or "aah" comments to pictures, which I still do when I see something that really catches my eye, but increasingly less, because I've started to find other more interesting and intriguing threads in this forum, which leaves me less time to spend looking at pics.

 

 

 

I hadn't seen the vid before but when I heard the lines I felt like "Hey Meeks, this IS you in just a few sentences!" Sharp but sweet. Plus it's such a cool interview, especially the end of it .

 

Sometimes I write just awwww and wow, because I have no words to describe why exactly I admire a certain pic, but anyway I want to thank a poster.

[Siu]

Sometimes I write just awwww and wow, because I have no words to describe why exactly I admire a certain pic, but anyway I want to thank a poster.

 

Exactly!

[laura*]

I didn't say it always happened on purpose.

But they do it very often to some people deliberately or not.

Whether they are newbies or not

I'm entitled to say that I often feel incomfortable on this thread or somewhere else...That's my genuine feeling and I won't avoid it.

 

K. Actually, I wasn't thinking of you as a newbie, that's why I couldn't understand. Now I've checked the date you joined and I'm surprised. I had the impression you had been here for years.

I'm not a newbie, but I get shunned quite frequently, but that's because I don't get along with lots of people on this forum.

 

 

I had a rather odd experience in one of the threads a few days ago, when two members were wondering whether they were the only ones there. I thought I was being polite letting them know that I was also there. My reply was followed by a long silence and then they continued as if I hadn't said anything. I didn't take it personally, but I did think it was time for me to leave the thread.

 

Don't think about it, there are definitely more important things in life than forum tiffs.

[Siu]

Don't think about it, there are definitely more important things in life than forum tiffs.

 

Thanks! I don't actually . I keep finding interesting threads to follow, so if nobody hears me knocking on one door, I try another

[Dreamy_Queen]

K. Actually, I wasn't thinking of you as a newbie, that's why I couldn't understand. Now I've checked the date you joined and I'm surprised. I had the impression you had been here for years.

I'm not a newbie, but I get shunned quite frequently, but that's because I don't get along with lots of people on this forum.

 

 

 

Don't think about it, there are definitely more important things in life than forum tiffs.

 

Really? I had an impression that you are very popular here. As soon as I joined, I paid attention to your posts - in many threads. Maybe because I happen to visit the range of the same threads?

[francoise]

What a pity to live so far away from you, guys!!

When I woke up, I have missed so many interesting posts that I just can't answer as much as I would like..

 

I understand so well what you're saying! I'm very new to MFC and I have no friends here. Yet anyway. On the "lighter" threads there are some MFCers I have a few words now and then but nothing serious. Pic treads are fine, I often browse through these and some of the pics make me want to express my thoughts so I sometimes post these in rather lengthy letters but often it's like running head first against a brick wall.

I'm glad to see there are other people who share my thoughts. Finding your place in a community where most of the communication is, well, semi-anonymous takes time and as it happens in real life, some people just don't fit in. I won't stop writing though .

 

I have this feeling sometimes too...

 

Here I am with it again, BUT... I was watching an interview with MIKA today from last year and there was a line he said that to me the best summarizes what I've been wanting to answer to your question all along. I quote: „I take the personality of the Cheshire Cat. The teeth are sharp. There... I'm ready to bite, but the power is in the smile.” And so it is, see for yourself below

 

 

Don't know this interview Siu. Do you have a link, please?

 

I totally agree! I always have quite a few of his interviews downloaded in my phone, so when I have longer walks in the city I sometimes (OK, rather often) listen to these. He's so witty and smart and good with words! Maybe that's another reason why women, middle-aged or not, like him - it is said that while men love with their eyes, women love with their ears and whether singing or talking, it's always a pleasure to listen to MIKA.

 

+1

I do it quite often also. As much for what he says as for hearing his sweet voice

 

It's a bit odd IMO. If you don't pay attention to the posts people share on the same thread as this one for example, not to mention in general, and if it seems to be pretty much regulary, then I can deduce only 2 things:

either you're not really interested in what they say for various reasons (maybe thie opinions are quite irrelevant, boring and not enough intriguing to you or to other MFCrs) OR you ignore

them on purpose.

In that case you or someone else maybe have some personal reasons to do things like that.

As for me I don't have much opportunity to chat with people on this thread or some other threads cause it seems they are not interested in it.

Shall I use the word ignoring then or something else?

 

I'm always interested with your posts my friend

 

Sometimes I write just awwww and wow, because I have no words to describe why exactly I admire a certain pic, but anyway I want to thank a poster.

 

Agree with you, it's a good way to thank the post and to pay attention to his efforts to find beautiful pics

[koolj5]

besides francoise and myself, has anyone seen this thread that christine has bumped:

 

i love you baby, but face it he's mika

http://www.mikafanclub.com/forums/showthread.php?p=3243218&posted=1#post3243218

 

it covers a lot of what we were talking about yesterday...

 

i can't believe christine made it up!

 

it's fun reading through old threads - in equal parts because of the people that aren't here anymore (there's still hope for us! ) and the people that we know (interesting what they said 3 years ago )

 

francoise - i think i know how you voted...

[southeast]

 

you're not ever getting scared of this thread, though, right? we're always just 'semi-serious' anyway...

don't want to loose you completely to that you-know-what thread

 

 

Sometimes I am even scared on this thread. But you know, WTF, it's only the Internet. I just want to have fun here & don't have any unpleasant experiences to influence me in my real life, so if it gets too scary, I'll just quit. But mostly I enjoy beeing on MFC because of this thread and the other one.

 

 

It's a bit odd IMO. If you don't pay attention to the posts people share on the same thread as this one for example, not to mention in general, and if it seems to be pretty much regulary, then I can deduce only 2 things:

either you're not really interested in what they say for various reasons (maybe thie opinions are quite irrelevant, boring and not enough intriguing to you or to other MFCrs) OR you ignore

them on purpose.

In that case you or someone else maybe have some personal reasons to do things like that.

As for me I don't have much opportunity to chat with people on this thread or some other threads cause it seems they are not interested in it.

Shall I use the word ignoring then or something else?

 

I am sorry you feel this way, Bojana! If you have the feeling I am ignoring you, please write this directly to me. It's really not intentional anyway, I often work on my desk at home while writing, sometimes I have to take a phone call or do something else in between so I have to jump off and leave quite suddenly. That's the only reason I leave conversations. So sorry about that if it was me who annoyed you.

 

I remember some, actually.

 

 

I know the ones you mean. Actually I was a bit angry at the time because pple were only talking about Mika's chest and stuff, so the post was meant to be sarcastic.

I don't like any pics of Mika on this thread - there are enough of them on the other threads.

[Dreamy_Queen]

Francoise, for you

 

[Siu]

Don't know this interview Siu. Do you have a link, please?

 

Here it is http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kiWJha3iiao. Enjoy watching!

 

besides francoise and myself, has anyone seen this thread that christine has bumped:

 

i love you baby, but face it he's mika

http://www.mikafanclub.com/forums/showthread.php?p=3243218&posted=1#post3243218

 

it covers a lot of what we were talking about yesterday...

 

i can't believe christine made it up!

 

I found it and they have found us . It's rather interesting to follow the two parallel threads which basically focus on the same issue but have a slightly different angle.

[Christine]

Hi all, I read this thread last night and made some comments in the other this morning.

 

I just wanted to comment here on people feeling ignored. This has come up many times on MFC so I understand that people feel this way but all I can do is reassure you that you shouldn't take it personally or at least not personally in a negative light. In some cases I do actually avoid people's particular comments intentionally because I think they will misinterpret my direct response or the fact that what I have to say will disagree with their comments. Some people like to engage in debate, others find it aggressive, even insulting, etc. It's hard to find the right balance sometimes.

 

For the most part though I just don't comment because I don't disagree, so it's probably a good thing! Often I will pick up on other's comments because it just brings up a point that I want to make myself so it does tend to happen with people I know well and like. But that doesn't mean I am not familiar or dislike the people I haven't quoted.

 

I don't read everything on MFC because that would be impossible, but it's very rare that I jump into a discussion in a thread without reading everything that's been said previously. If it's an important issue and a long discussion I will sometimes even take a day or two to make sure I've heard what everyone has to say before making my own comments.

 

Since people have been talking about this for years I do try to make an extra effort to address people directly when I've noticed what they've said, but it's a big busy board and sometimes it just doesn't happen. It doesn't mean your posts are being ignored though.

[Dreamy_Queen]

Hi all, I read this thread last night and made some comments in the other this morning.

 

I just wanted to comment here on people feeling ignored. This has come up many times on MFC so I understand that people feel this way but all I can do is reassure you that you shouldn't take it personally or at least not personally in a negative light. In some cases I do actually avoid people's particular comments intentionally because I think they will misinterpret my direct response or the fact that what I have to say will disagree with their comments. Some people like to engage in debate, others find it aggressive, even insulting, etc. It's hard to find the right balance sometimes.

 

For the most part though I just don't comment because I don't disagree, so it's probably a good thing! Often I will pick up on other's comments because it just brings up a point that I want to make myself so it does tend to happen with people I know well and like. But that doesn't mean I am not familiar or dislike the people I haven't quoted.

 

I don't read everything on MFC because that would be impossible, but it's very rare that I jump into a discussion in a thread without reading everything that's been said previously. If it's an important issue and a long discussion I will sometimes even take a day or two to make sure I've heard what everyone has to say before making my own comments.

 

Since people have been talking about this for years I do try to make an extra effort to address people directly when I've noticed what they've said, but it's a big busy board and sometimes it just doesn't happen. It doesn't mean your posts are being ignored though.

 

Thank you for writing your point of view! It's so nice to read it!

[southeast]

You have to be very diplomatic with smilies on MFC.

 

Have you noticed: There is only a small f****** difference btw. lmao and lmfao but sometimes it really can be interpreted in the wrong way. Like with the first one you're making fun of the poster and with the second one you're laughing at the message.

 

I mean, sometimes I really wonder if I am using the right smilies. Did you ever experience the same? Using the wrong smilie?

[Dreamy_Queen]

You have to be very diplomatic with smilies on MFC.

 

Have you noticed: There is only a small f****** difference btw. lmao and lmfao but sometimes it really can be interpreted in the wrong way. Like with the first one you're making fun of the poster and with the second one you're laughing at the message.

 

I mean, sometimes I really wonder if I am using the right smilies. Did you ever experience the same? Using the wrong smilie?

 

I use this to show I feel like cool and confident, but in fact it is called rosetinted and maybe means rose positivistic glasses. But I see that everyone means what I mean , not optimism but coolness

[laura*]

Really? I had an impression that you are very popular here. As soon as I joined, I paid attention to your posts - in many threads. Maybe because I happen to visit the range of the same threads?

 

Popular or unpopular? It depends on who your MFC friends are.

Anyway I have been here for over 3 years and I have always posted in the English threads, so I guess it's normal. But I have learnt that meeting people in real life is NOT healthy at all. So I have decided not to meet forum people at gigs ever again. Of course, I will be glad to meet the people I trust and I like at gigs, but I am not going to look for real life friends anymore here. I only want to enjoy the music, the gigs and the forum for what it is: a Web community.

 

Thanks anyway, I appreciate your support.

 

You have to be very diplomatic with smilies on MFC.

 

Have you noticed: There is only a small f****** difference btw. lmao and lmfao but sometimes it really can be interpreted in the wrong way. Like with the first one you're making fun of the poster and with the second one you're laughing at the message.

 

I mean, sometimes I really wonder if I am using the right smilies. Did you ever experience the same? Using the wrong smilie?

 

Of course not! I'm perfect.

[southeast]

I use this to show I feel like cool and confident, but in fact it is called rosetinted and maybe means rose positivistic glasses. But I see that everyone means what I mean , not optimism but coolness

 

Yes, exactly. Actually, one should use for coolness. But no one does it. is also a difficult one - never know how to use this one.

 

Popular or unpopular? It depends on who your MFC friends are.

Anyway I have been here for over 3 years and I have always posted in the English threads, so I guess it's normal. But I have learnt that meeting people in real life is NOT healthy at all. So I have decided not to meet forum people at gigs ever again. Of course, I will be glad to meet the people I trust and I like at gigs, but I am not going to look for real life friends anymore here. I only want to enjoy the music, the gigs and the forum for what it is: a Web community.

 

Thanks anyway, I appreciate your support.

 

Of course not! I'm perfect.

 

#yeahright

[laura*]

 

 

#yeahright

 

[sienna]

You have to be very diplomatic with smilies on MFC.

 

Have you noticed: There is only a small f****** difference btw. lmao and lmfao but sometimes it really can be interpreted in the wrong way. Like with the first one you're making fun of the poster and with the second one you're laughing at the message.

 

I mean, sometimes I really wonder if I am using the right smilies. Did you ever experience the same? Using the wrong smilie?

 

But doesn't has to do with your own personal interpretation how you copy the value of a smiley? Maybe not:shocked: maybe there is some common Internet code that I have missed?

 

When I was new to this whole thing I just imitated what the others did!

 

I remember that we used this one to point out that we tried to be sarcastic, and then, I don't exactly remember why, we changed it to this this one to express the same thing! It was funny. It looked like we were some freaky Christmas worshippers!

[sariflor]

That's right, I started off in the pics threads mostly, because this was the easy way to merge in and I'm not going to deny that some of the threads are at first rather overwhelming, if you know what I mean . I still go through these every once in a while but firstly, I rather prefer focusing on the artistic side of MIKA than on his appealing body, though I can't deny I'm fully aware of it . And secondly, I prefer discussing issues of interest rather than writing empty "wow" or "aah" comments to pictures, which I still do when I see something that really catches my eye, but increasingly less, because I've started to find other more interesting and intriguing threads in this forum, which leaves me less time to spend looking at pics.

 

 

Yes, that is also how I feel. There are plenty of threads that interest me, where one can have a good discussion about something and exchange views with others, and personally I'd rather do that than look at Mika pics or stuff like that

 

 

But I have learnt that meeting people in real life is NOT healthy at all. So I have decided not to meet forum people at gigs ever again. Of course, I will be glad to meet the people I trust and I like at gigs, but I am not going to look for real life friends anymore here. I only want to enjoy the music, the gigs and the forum for what it is: a Web community.

 

 

Well, I have to strongly disagree here. I have met a number of people from MFC who have become some of my best friends in RL,and we have become such great friends that we meet as often as we can. Because some of them live in different continents and countries, sometimes this means that we need to plan trips months in advance in order to do so, but it's always an incredible experience when we do meet.

We chat every day online, on MFC and through private channels, and have established solid, real, genuine friendships.

So yes, it can totally happen.

A web community can be that, or some of the people can spill into ones real life. Just because it hasn't worked for you, doesn't mean that it hasn't worked for many others. In fact, I have heard of far more cases where people met great friends through MFC than the opposite situation.

 

 

But doesn't has to do with your own personal interpretation how you copy the value of a smiley? Maybe not:shocked: maybe there is some common Internet code that I have missed?

 

When I was new to this whole thing I just imitated what the others did!

 

I remember that we used this one to point out that we tried to be sarcastic, and then, I don't exactly remember why, we changed it to this this one to express the same thing! It was funny. It looked like we were some freaky Christmas worshippers!

 

I agree Sienna, I often just do what I see others do, and hope that they get me in what I am trying to say

[laura*]

Well, I have to strongly disagree here. I have met a number of people from MFC who have become some of my best friends in RL,and we have become such great friends that we meet as often as we can. Because some of them live in different continents and countries, sometimes this means that we need to plan trips months in advance in order to do so, but it's always an incredible experience when we do meet.

We chat every day online, on MFC and through private channels, and have established solid, real, genuine friendships.

So yes, it can totally happen.

A web community can be that, or some of the people can spill into ones real life. Just because it hasn't worked for you, doesn't mean that it hasn't worked for many others. In fact, I have heard of far more cases where people met great friends through MFC than the opposite situation.

 

 

I really can't believe you manage to disagree with me even when I talk about something that has happened to me! Which definitely proves me right about this community... Actually, I have found a friend on mikasounds.com and she's different from most of the people from MFC I have met in real life. So I think things can work for me, too. It just depends on the community. And I also have a couple of special friends I got to know here. I am open to exceptions.

Anyway being a close friend of the mods' can only help you get along with people more easily here, for sure! So your situation cannot be compared to mine.

[Droopsy]

I really can't believe you manage to disagree with me even when I talk about something that has happened to me! Which definitely proves me right about this community... Actually, I have found a friend on mikasounds.com and she's different from most of the people from MFC I have met in real life. So I think things can work for me, too. It just depends on the community. And I also have a couple of special friends I got to know here. I am open to exceptions.

Anyway being a close friend of the mods' can only help you get along with people more easily here, for sure! So your situation cannot be compared to mine.

 

You're kidding right

 

Anyways, I don't disagree with you about your post about meeting people in real life I assume you didn't have good experiences with it so for you this is true. However, I personally am glad to have met some of the people I've met. Especially the other Belgian fans (geographical advantage), we really get along and meet up a few times and/or do things together that have nothing to do with Mika. Last weekend e.g. I went to a tv show with one of them So yes, I'm sorry that it didn't work out that way for you