calicojasmine

Hi Everybody! I haven't been on in awhile - just lots of stuff going on.... But I saw this thread and just wanted to share .... my thoughts of sympathy and loss of MJ. He was truly a legend... and most definitely "The King of Pop".... I watched him grow up.... and evolve... from the Boy Wonder to truly a gifted but troubled soul. It's sad that this has become the Media Circus that it is... I have many strong feelings about the medical turmoil he endured.... and his last days...... Lots of questions which need to be answered.... One thing I am very sure about, however.... He will never be forgotten. xoxo cj

I SO HEAR YOU, GIRL!!!!

My feelings??? Thank you asking. I really don't like any of his new music. Maybe I'm going to have to warm up to it in time.... Or maybe it's finally time to get off the Mika train...

What can i say? "meh".

You are so absolutely right!!! Like I say over and over again.... I'm incredibly thankful for a lot of things most people take for granted - having adequate housing, my cat Cali.... and being able to walk a few blocks!!! When you go through stuff like: staggering from bed to bathroom, then couch.... and subsequently passing out - a walk in the spring fresh air for a few blocks is unbelievable!!!!!!

avoca, sooo sorry you're having a bad time. EVERY YEAR, for me, is laden with problems and hardships... I know how you feel.... Life is frustrating but, like you said, you have to hang on and cling to life... and make the most of all the good things, as small and inconsequential as they may seem..... Please PM me ANYTIME if you'd like to vent and/or chat.

Hi everybody - I'm HOME....

Well, I haven't seen the movie yet, but I'm part way through the 3rd book - Eclipse..... The 1st two books is how I spent the whole Christmas holidays and January until I went into surgery.... then I kinda lost my ability to concentrate.... so I'll hopefully pick up Eclipse again soon........... I can TOTALLY RELATE to the entire Twilight vampire concept - seeing as I really do look like one myself.... losing so much blood, having transfusions, etc... While they were pumping me with blood in hospital a couple of weeks ago I was listening to the Twilight soundtrack (which I absolutely LOVE!!!) the entire time....... Couldn't escape the "irony".... (while they pumped me full of hemoglobin and ferritin a.k.a. "iron"!!!) hehehehe:naughty: Y'see????? STILL TRYING TO LAUGH!!!!

Progress Report: If anyone cares, that is.... The Good News: I managed to walk approximately 12 blocks today!!! The Bad News: I may have strep throat.... going to the clinic tomorrow... But More Good News: I'm ALWAYS FIGHTING BACK!!!!!

Scary element? Do tell.... I'm happy that I got a good walk in today.... many blocks... a VERY good sign....

SURE! Some sugar ....... just what we need for our teeth to rot!!! LOL! Hope you're relatively okay and hangin' in ...... it sucks to be sick.........

I think that what babs is saying is that in order to not be constantly let down by unfulfilled and/or unreasonable goals, one needs to set their sights a little lower.. after all,no expectations, no disappointments..... And in the long run the things that really matter the most are not so much about objects and monetary acquisitions, but about the simple things in life which most people take for granted - health issues, matters of the heart and the simple, creature comforts which enable us to thrive as human beings. I think the Rolling Stones capture this concept so eloquently: - "You can't always get what you want - but if you try sometimes you just might find - you get what you need......."

I know what you mean. I often feel like I have too much time on my hands.... to think..... and remember..... not always the best thing to do.... but I really want to make a difference for others. I guess I'm just trying to save others a lot of the grief I've encountered over the years. Kinda like a cookbook for the mind, if that makes any sense at all......

hahahahahaha well said!!!

Hmmmmmmmmm.......... Seeing my trauma specialist and absolutely cracking him up with one of my "dark jokes"..... hehe:naughty:

Loss really is a 4-letter word..... Or, as in my case, transfused directly into my veins.......

Hahahahahaha TOO FUNNY!!!!!!! I know that look...... Been there, done that, got the toilet paper..... hehehe:naughty:

Thank you so much!!! Yeah, the bad stuff has been going on all my life. It's gotten pretty old, you know? Sometimes it's REALLY DIFFICULT to make any sense from it all... such a struggle... especially going through it all pretty much alone.... But somehow, for some crazy reason I keep getting through it... and I keep having these close calls... I guess my work here on earth isn't done yet, and I'm here for some kind of purpose...... Speaking of "close calls" - 2 weeks ago I went to see my GP... I took a cab there..... I had no sooner gotten out of the cab there was this MASSIVE accident..... a pickup truck which had struck a pedestrian a few blocks away was fleeing the scene at an outrageous speed... This hit and run then smashed into 4 vehicles (including the cab I had just exited), totaling every car it struck. He then proceeded to crash in a head on fashion (he crossed the lane and was in the oncoming lane) - he was going SOOOOO FAST THAT HE WAS ACTUALLY AIRBORNE!!!!! Then crashed at such a velocity that one of his tires came flying off, sending it just past where I was, and landing 2 BLOCKS FROM THE ACCIDENT SITE!!!!!!! You CAN'T make this stuff up!!!!!!! Sometimes I think my internal bleed is from the horseshoe that is lodged up my ass.........

And one more thing to be oh-so-grateful for....... our gorgeous Mika in a tux!!!!!! How 'bout that, Girlfriends??????????

Thank you all! Yesss, it continues to be quite the ride. I hope my book will help others understand the heartbreak of medical misdiagnoses and its' subsequent traumatic, chaotic and tragic repercussions.

Thank you so much, silver and violet_sky. Yesss...... things have sure been crazy for me. I have this internal bleed, and I've been losing a lot of blood for quite awhile. That makes me dizzy, light-headed and weak, so I started having a lot of falls. That resulted in all kinds of injuries (fractures, abrasions, bruises, stitches, bruised ribs on BOTH sides)... which didn't help the bleeding, only made it worse... so I sustained more falls and more injuries..... a vicious circle. I eventually had surgery in January to try and stop the bleeding... only I lost even more blood and ended up needing a transfusion. Now I'm being closely monitored... and may need more transfusions... To top everything off, I live alone and I've really been having problems managing anything.... But being the stubborn fool that I am I have been fighting through it all.... Oh well.... they say "only the good die young"... so I guess that rules me out! LOL! Having all this adversity has just made me realize how inconsequential most things are. "Don't sweat the small stuff" - so true! And with all this crap going on I've become very grateful for the things that most people take for granted. I'm so thankful to have a warm, dry apartment (I NEVER want to live under a bridge! No bathrooms! LOL!) My space is my own safe haven which I don't have to share with any abusive roommates. And then there's my sweet and wonderful Cali-Cat - who constantly showers me with unconditional love. As well - not having a job is finally a GOOD THING! I don't have one to lose! LOL! And finally - I thank the lord for my sense of humor - they say that laughter is the best medicine..... sure beats crying - only there's a place for tears, too.... a natural cleanse/detox. However, my heart goes out to all the homeless people in the world ... they really do live life one day at a time... I also really empathize and comprehend the daily painful struggle the chronically ill have to endure. As well, I feel deeply for all those lost souls who constantly have to face abuse and domestic violence (Man, can I ever relate to that!!!) So there's a lot of pain going on here - but also a plethora of reflection...... Is it any wonder I'm writing a book?

Thanks Babs.... Yeah... I'm hangin' in.... by a noose! LOL!

Hello Everyone... It sure has been awhile since I've last posted. That's probably because I've been up to my a** in alligators..... coping with an over-abundance of misfortune, trauma and just plain bad f***ing luck. But I have survived once again to tell my tale... and have actually taken THAT to a whole new level by starting to pen my memoirs. After all.... 'YOU CAN'T MAKE THIS STUFF UP!!!!":wink2: I've also modified the expression of "That which doesn't kill you makes you stronger". My rendition of this is "That which doesn't kill you makes you crazy." At least I haven't lost my sense of humor, as dark as it may be..... Yesss... these are exceptionally hard times for everyone. Unemployment is at a ridiculous high and a lot of people are finding their homes in foreclosure. Scary, scary stuff. Obviously one needs to prioritize... assess what we NEED as opposed to what we WANT... and never lose sight of our goals and aspirations. So many people place so much emphasis on superficialities and monetary acquisitions. But at the end of the day we need to realize that our health and our relationships are paramount to a lifetime of well-being. I guess these concepts resonate so deeply with me because all my life I have struggled with health issues. I've also, unfortunately, been involved in some highly abusive relationships (not anymore, thank god!) But I got to walk away with my dignity intact and a protective barrier instilled - a.k.a. being selective and setting boundaries. The health problems, unfortunately, are a lot harder to resolve. Without meaning to sound trite, I have always managed that, when dealt lemons to make lemonade. But that doesn't mean I necessarily LIKE lemonade. Sometimes it actually makes me gag.

As much as I DON'T LIKE John McCain - - - - I have to admit that his last speech was very well done - definitely a class act..... And waking up today - - - - knowing that it was NOT a dream - but reality..... HOPE....

"I'll go find some and get back to you". "You betcha!" And then she laughs when the comedian says that killing animals (taking a life) was so great........... Tina Fey had the story straight.... hahahaha