Fmbm Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 It's 2007 all over again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
neeve272 Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 just popping my head in There's a similar thread here where a few of us discussed the issues as well, if anyone's interested http://www.mikafanclub.com/forums/showthread.php?t=18258 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soaring Simpson Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 It's not necessary for him to say anything to the general public. Only if I was about to be in a relationship with him (not very likely, I admit, since I'm old enough to be his mother ) would I have any "right" to know about his preferences. Otherwise, it's his business who he tells, and when, and how much is exposed in the public arena. I'm interested in him as a performer, not as a soap opera character. I simply don't need to know all the personal stuff, if he doesn't want to tell me. Sure- but why only tell people what they have a "right" to know or "need to know" only when its "necessary"? Though I respect Mika generally, I would think more of him if he did something not absolutely necessary- just becuase it might help people. And I think it probably would. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soaring Simpson Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 just popping my head in There's a similar thread here where a few of us discussed the issues as well, if anyone's interested http://www.mikafanclub.com/forums/showthread.php?t=18258 I might have a look at that later- thanks- though at the moment I'm enjoying the "live" discussion (and supposed to be swotting) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christine Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 Some of the WAG threads on here seem to suggest that if a guy can dance he must be gay. That's not what people were saying - AT ALL. First of all Mika can't dance particularly well so he will never be labelled gay by anyone for his dancing skills (sorry Mika, not that I'm any better, just stating the facts ) Mika wasn't just wearing "fancy" clothes in the video, he was wearing things that no straight man would be caught dead in. Likes scarves with pink teapots knit into them. I found it amusing that one of the people in the thread who were so vehemently protesting the gayness of the video had an avatar of Mika with a naked male doll in his mouth. Many of the things that apparently appeal to Mika come across as very gay. Whether this is an accurate reflection of his sexual orientation is another matter altogether, but that doesn't change the fact that it's a reasonable expectation that people will label these things (and consequently him) gay. Mika is as aware of this as anyone since he has been labelled gay since he was a child. He knew he was making a video that was going to come across as camp I'm quite sure. He is not a naive little lamb and no matter how much he or any of us would like to dispense with labels they are just part of our reality, at least at this moment in history. It's not the Regency period, it is 2009 and things that contravene the straight culture of 2009 are going to be labelled gay, by both straight and gay people. Has anyone ever felt the need to tell everyone they were openly straight? No because it is obvious. I was saying to zoots the other day that Paolo Nutini reminds you that he's straight every 10 minutes. It comes up in his interviews, it permeates his songs. It's just part of his personality and anyone who has paid as much attention to him as we pay to Mika KNOWS he is straight. There is no question, no mystery. When someone refuses to discuss their sexuality because they deem it irrelevant most people are going to take that as a cue that the sexuality orientation in question is something other than straight. Because straight people are not judged harshly for being straight it rarely occurs to anyone to attempt to mask it or avoid the subject. Now Mika is not just some guy next door and because he is asked these questions in a very public way he could have other reasons for not providing answers. Which brings us back to the topic...I felt in early 2007 that I would have liked Mika to dispense with the coyness and be up front. But over the following months I watched the press interest in him die off. By keeping his private life private he has managed to avoid the kind of attention and harassment that Amy Winehouse and Lily Allen have to deal with on a daily basis. It is not incumbent upon Mika to be a role model for the gay community (as a gay man or as a straight man who is fearless about appearing gay). If this is what he needs to do to protect his life from turning into a circus then I fully support his stance. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gatagordinha Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 It's 2007 all over again. Yes it is isn't it; that's kind of the point here, I think. Mika's back in the limelight and this issue isn't about to go away. There are new fans here now, many of them understandably intrigued by the sexuality issue and it's only natural threads like this pop up again. As for me, I think it's perfectly legitimate to discuss this again, especially since Mika himself appears to be opening up ever so slightly on the issue. As long as we all stick to forum guidelines in discussing it, of course. My personal stance has always been this: I am curious about his sexuality and have my own view on it, but totally accept I may be wrong, and in any case, it makes absolutely no difference to me, to my life or to how I view Mika as a person or as a musician. I do believe he has a perfect right to NOT publicly declare his sexual orientation, and I also confess that in not doing do he retains an air of mystique which is actually very appealing. I think that if he were in any way labelled, it might be detrimental to the way he is perceived, even though it's sad to say that in the 21st Century There's no easy answer, no right or wrong, as regards whether Mika should declare his sexuality; there are so many sides to this Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tiibet Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 Now I'm off to lunch before I eat the keyboard out of anger. Why are you so angry? It's not necessary for him to say anything to the general public. Only if I was about to be in a relationship with him (not very likely, I admit, since I'm old enough to be his mother ) would I have any "right" to know about his preferences. Otherwise, it's his business who he tells, and when, and how much is exposed in the public arena. I'm interested in him as a performer, not as a soap opera character. I simply don't need to know all the personal stuff, if he doesn't want to tell me. Yes, he can do whatever he wants and we still love him It's 2007 all over again. This happens here regularly, doesn't it? Many of the things that apparently appeal to Mika come across as very gay. Whether this is an accurate reflection of his sexual orientation is another matter altogether, but that doesn't change the fact that it's a reasonable expectation that people will label these things (and consequently him) gay. Mika is as aware of this as anyone since he has been labelled gay since he was a child. He knew he was making a video that was going to come across as camp I'm quite sure. He is not a naive little lamb and no matter how much he or any of us would like to dispense with labels they are just part of our reality, at least at this moment in history. It's not the Regency period, it is 2009 and things that contravene the straight culture of 2009 are going to be labelled gay, by both straight and gay people. No because it is obvious. I was saying to zoots the other day that Paolo Nutini reminds you that he's straight every 10 minutes. It comes up in his interviews, it permeates his songs. It's just part of his personality and anyone who has paid as much attention to him as we pay to Mika KNOWS he is straight. There is no question, no mystery. When someone refuses to discuss their sexuality because they deem it irrelevant most people are going to take that as a cue that the sexuality orientation in question is something other than straight. Because straight people are not judged harshly for being straight it rarely occurs to anyone to attempt to mask it or avoid the subject. Now Mika is not just some guy next door and because he is asked these questions in a very public way he could have other reasons for not providing answers. Which brings us back to the topic...I felt in early 2007 that I would have liked Mika to dispense with the coyness and be up front. But over the following months I watched the press interest in him die off. By keeping his private life private he has managed to avoid the kind of attention and harassment that Amy Winehouse and Lily Allen have to deal with on a daily basis. It is not incumbent upon Mika to be a role model for the gay community (as a gay man or as a straight man who is fearless about appearing gay). If this is what he needs to do to protect his life from turning into a circus then I fully support his stance. Just bolded one part of your message, but yes, agree with you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fmbm Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 This happens here regularly, doesn't it? It really does MFC seems to be known for re-hashing topics to death. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sienna Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 Has anyone ever felt the need to tell everyone they were openly straight? Yes, every summer when I’ve been working on the Stockholm pride festival as a volunteer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soaring Simpson Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 That's not what people were saying - AT ALL. . I don't think its a coincidence that the "you can just tell" brigade were brought out in force by a video where he's dancing. Otherwise you're pretty much expanding on what I said. (Except I think he dances well in both the WAG and the Love Today videos.) I have certainly never suggested he is naive or doesn't know exactly what people are going to think- it surprises me that you think I would. I know people label a set of behaviours "gay"- like they used to label some behaviours "feminine" or "unfeminine". What I'm saying is that the practice is unhelpful, mostly to straight men, and that if Mika is straight, he's more useful as a role model than if he's gay. There is very little interest in Will Young's relationships or that guy from the Feeling's (sorry, know his name perfectly well but can't remember. Dan?) becuase they know how to behave themselves in public. Unlike Amy Winehouse and Lily Allen who are both straight. The way to keep your relationships out of the press seems to be to avoid (at least in public) screaming rows, drunken crying jags, and slobbering over each other. Announcing you're gay doesn't seem to affect press coverage at all. IF I thought keeping quiet was what was keeping his life from becoming a media circus, I would would be in favour of it. But if he's gay, I don't think that's true at all. If he's straight, however, maybe there's something to it- the press might try to catch him in what they thought was a lie. Which might explain why over the last 18 months or so, I've swung round from assuming he's gay to thinking he might well not be. The "permeating his songs" bit seems important to me. Mika's sexuality has so far been kept out of his- which makes them refreshing, but I'd still like to see the effect of more openness in his songwriting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soaring Simpson Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 It really does MFC seems to be known for re-hashing topics to death. Well we haven't had this one since I started following MFC in Feb 08- that's 18 months. (I can think of a much more popular topic!) I am comparatively new, and I'm enjoying it. Except I really must get on with the stuff I took a day off work for! I'll be back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fmbm Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 Well we haven't had this one since I started following MFC in Feb 08- that's 18 months. (I can think of a much more popular topic!) I am comparatively new, and I'm enjoying it. Except I really must get on with the stuff I took a day off work for! I'll be back. True. Guess I've been on here for too long Yes, get back to work Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
suzie Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 As for me, I think it's perfectly legitimate to discuss this again, especially since Mika himself appears to be opening up ever so slightly on the issue. As long as we all stick to forum guidelines in discussing it, of course. .... To me, this thread is actually slightly different from previous ones as if you read the first post, the question asked is if he should come out to create a positive perception of gay men... That's why I tried to look at it from another perspective this time... It would be interesting to know more gay guy's opinion on this... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gatagordinha Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 .... To me, this thread is actually slightly different from previous ones as if you read the first post, the question asked is if he should come out to create a positive perception of gay men... That's why I tried to look at it from another perspective this time... It would be interesting to know more gay guy's opinion on this... I agree with you, it would be interesting to read more gay guys' opinions on this. Come on lads, we know you're out there (if you'll pardon the crap pun:naughty:), let's hear it. Threads like this are always fascinating to read, provided they don't descend into chaotic argument. Much as I love the lighthearted frothy threads (and I am never one to shy away from those ) I do enjoy reading people's intelligent opinions sometimes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alice.loves.mika Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 But then if he did come out as gay, then people would be more focused on his love life and personal life rather than his music. I know he doesn't want that, and I wouldn't like that to happen either. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marilyn Mastin Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 I know it may sound selfish, but if Mika were to disclose his sexuality, I think he would create a very positive perception of gay men in the music industry. However, I also like fact that he's comfortable enough with his sexuality that he's unbothered by what people think. I was reading the German interview and Mika said that he needs to keep his life private, for the sake of his creativity. I think he's letting things out in his songs bit by bit, but I wouldn't want to push him to own up to anything. Mika gives a lot really, with the beautiful music and words he writes, But tbh I get the feeling (especially from that interview) that he is very fragile. I think people should stop going on about whether he likes men, women, or both. He's Mika, and there is no one else like him! That should be enough for us to know. Our job is to love and support him, whatever he says, or does not say. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vélez Patti Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 I believe that IF Mika is gay and is keeping quiet the mensage he tells the world is that to be accept in a straight world you have to hide your preference. That's the obvious mensage you take. But I truly believe that there are other resons for that. When you were someone who suffered bullying and that was a homofobic one, well otherwise you have a strong help from friends and family, you maybe not deal very well with it . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mandilambi Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 I think it's great that some gay people in public life are happy to discuss their sexuality in public - it is much better than having to keep things secret, and provides role models for young people growing up. But I do not want to live in a world where everone is required to declare their sexuality - it's nobody's business but theirs, and the world is complicated, feelings change, emotions are not straightforward. I wouldn't want Mika to be defined as "a gay artist" (even if it were true - we don't know) as if that was the only interesting thing about him. No artist is ever labelled a "straight artist" - labels are used by the media to keep people in their place. They get in the way of legitimate appreciation of the music. I'm glad Mika is as private as he is - so the music can speak for him Great post. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RAK1 Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 I've always been fascinated by this whole role model thing. Why do people feel they need one? And if they absolutely do, why a celeb, since 95% of the time, they are screwed up individuals, who themselves are looking for something to make sense of their own problems and insecurities? I can't say I have ever looked for a role model to make me feel better about myself, because I know that there really isn't anyone out there, who can do that. The only person who can do it, is yourself. Because everyone is an indiviual, no two people are alike. So looking to someone else, even if they have similar traits, characteristics, insecurities etc. will only be like putting a Band Aid on a bulletwound. It won't really help you, it's just a quick fix solution. For myself, I identify with Mika for the bullying he went through. Although mine wasn't as severe, it was just as traumatic for me. But I don't look on him as my role model because of it, just some one who was in the same boat as me. I survived it, he survived it, like millions of others who go through it everyday. But at the time I never looked for someone to aspire too, to get me through it. I managed to do that myself, because I felt it was for me to do that. Not that I don't think people in that position shouldn't ask for help and get that help. Just not look to one particular person for inspiration, as there are so many people out there in the same boat, that you can get it from, as a group. That's how I got through it knowing I wasn't alone. That's why I don't see that Mika, if he is gay, coming out, should make a difference to any of his gay fans. You are your own person, you shouldn't look to famous people to aspire to as far as your sexuality goes. Having a celeb as a role model, isn't going to change how people see you. Only you can do that, if you really want it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dark Angel Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 i think im going to keep out of this thread i can feel abig row coming on + 1 Only thing i have to say is, he is what he is... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mikalollipop_karla Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 feed, mm, I have no thoughts for this, as I want, I do not mind their sexual orientation Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CazGirl Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 I was reading the German interview and Mika said that he needs to keep his life private, for the sake of his creativity. I think he's letting things out in his songs bit by bit, but I wouldn't want to push him to own up to anything. Mika gives a lot really, with the beautiful music and words he writes, But tbh I get the feeling (especially from that interview) that he is very fragile. I think people should stop going on about whether he likes men, women, or both. He's Mika, and there is no one else like him! That should be enough for us to know. Our job is to love and support him, whatever he says, or does not say. AGREEEEEEED I've always been fascinated by this whole role model thing.Why do people feel they need one? And if they absolutely do, why a celeb, since 95% of the time, they are screwed up individuals, who themselves are looking for something to make sense of their own problems and insecurities? I can't say I have ever looked for a role model to make me feel better about myself, because I know that there really isn't anyone out there, who can do that. The only person who can do it, is yourself. Because everyone is an indiviual, no two people are alike. So looking to someone else, even if they have similar traits, characteristics, insecurities etc. will only be like putting a Band Aid on a bulletwound. It won't really help you, it's just a quick fix solution. For myself, I identify with Mika for the bullying he went through. Although mine wasn't as severe, it was just as traumatic for me. But I don't look on him as my role model because of it, just some one who was in the same boat as me. I survived it, he survived it, like millions of others who go through it everyday. But at the time I never looked for someone to aspire too, to get me through it. I managed to do that myself, because I felt it was for me to do that. Not that I don't think people in that position shouldn't ask for help and get that help. Just not look to one particular person for inspiration, as there are so many people out there in the same boat, that you can get it from, as a group. That's how I got through it knowing I wasn't alone. That's why I don't see that Mika, if he is gay, coming out, should make a difference to any of his gay fans. You are your own person, you shouldn't look to famous people to aspire to as far as your sexuality goes. Having a celeb as a role model, isn't going to change how people see you. Only you can do that, if you really want it. Bravo! *applauds* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mikalollipop_karla Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 + 1 Only thing i have to say is, he is what he is... yeah Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SashaX Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 I was reading the German interview and Mika said that he needs to keep his life private, for the sake of his creativity. I think he's letting things out in his songs bit by bit, but I wouldn't want to push him to own up to anything. Mika gives a lot really, with the beautiful music and words he writes, But tbh I get the feeling (especially from that interview) that he is very fragile. I think people should stop going on about whether he likes men, women, or both. He's Mika, and there is no one else like him! That should be enough for us to know. Our job is to love and support him, whatever he says, or does not say. Totally agree Exactly what I think! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
guylainem123 Posted August 11, 2009 Share Posted August 11, 2009 Has anyone ever felt the need to tell everyone they were openly straight? no, cuz it's usually quite obvious, but i get what you're saying It's 2007 all over again. yes, with a 2009 twist to it. Christine, i didn't quote you, but i love your post. makes total sense to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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