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Mika's Personal Life


lollipop_monkey
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So there's been a bit of back and forth lately regarding what we can and cannot discuss on this site about Mika's life outside of the music. There are quite a few subtle, vaguely defined "rules" that are agreed to be understood, but aren't specifically spelled out.

 

His sexuality is one area that this pertains to. There always has been an "I don't care" position on his sexuality; most people on here agree with that, which I take to mean that regardless of his sexual orientation, it wouldn’t affect their appreciation for his music.

 

That said, not being affected by his sexual orientation in terms of enjoying his music doesn't necessarily mean people aren't curious about it. And so the topic comes up every now and again, and usually causes a bit of a commotion. Someone asks a question, and someone else gets offended that the topic was dredged up yet again.

 

So instead of tiptoeing around the issue, I thought it’s time we stop walking on eggshells and have a good solid discussion, and get some thoughts, opinions and feedback out in the open.

 

Mika has said two things: that he likes to keep his private life private, and that he doesn’t like to talk about his sexuality. But – does that mean WE should refrain from talking about his sexuality? On one hand, we could argue that since he prefers not to talk about it, neither should we. Conversely, we could argue that he appears on the covers of magazines like “Out” and seems friendly with Perez Hilton who called him “Gay Gay Gay” ages ago – therefore, it doesn’t matter if WE discuss it, just that Mika HIMSELF doesn’t want to discuss it.

 

There are other aspects to this besides his sexuality. What about other things that aren’t about the music that are pure speculation – say, musing about whether he eats meat and why he doesn’t have a driver’s license? Or whether he’d ever date a backup dancer?

 

What about his family? Do we not talk about them, period? Are there different rules regarding DaWack as compared to his other family members, as she took part in the LICM project? Can we post their photos if they are present at public appearances? Someone once said they were nervous about posting a picture of Mika’s old music teacher Alla, despite the fact that the pic in question was a professional shot taken in relation to her career in music. What about contact? He said during an interview with Radio 1 that he had fans leave gifts at his house. What do people think about that?

 

I realize this might be rather out there and blunt - and that I might get flamed for starting this - but it seems like the “personal life” protocol as it stands now is a bit of a game of Whack-A-Mole. A controversial thread pops up, and the moderators whack it back down, (as they rightfully should if something inappropriate is being discussed). But then another pops up. And another whack. If I were a mod, I’d be a bit unsure a lot of the time exactly where the line is drawn on controversial topics.

 

Let me say that for this to work – for us to have an open, candid, honest, mature discussion, people need to think before they hit reply. Let me state at the outset that personal attacks on other members, or on our mods as a team, will not be tolerated.

 

I realize that with so many different opinions, we won't end up with any hard and fast rules. What we might be able to achieve is some clarity.

 

So. Thoughts, feelings, perspectives?

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Freedom of speech........????

 

Just an idea, but I do agree there are things that could go too far, but none of us are meaning anything we say to upset him or his family. People just seem curious......

 

If you don't want to take part in a thread on e.g. Mika's sexuality, then don't post or read it....simple

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I agree on this thread.

 

I've noticed most of the same people saying "I don't care.:mf_rosetinted: " are the first to talk about him being in relationships with boys/girls. Which, whatever. I don't really care if people talk about it or if they don't. But I think we all honestly have our own opinion, and I wouldn't mind hearing why people think what they think.

 

Besides, if they "don't care", why is it such a hard issue to talk about?

 

I'm gonna go get some pizza, and WHEN I COME BACK, I wanna read everyone elses' opinions. *KA-subscribe-POW!*

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Right on Mana:punk: You and I think alike I must say.

 

It's hard to say where I stand, because I'm pretty laid back about these kinds of things. There are always going to be people who want to know where he lives, who he's with and all that. That stuff isn't necessary to loving Mika however. People might just feel it's their right to know...even if it isn't.

 

So, the fact that people dropped gifts off at his house sort of surprised me...but what surprised me more was his reaction to it. He didn't seemed very bothered by it in the slightest. Perhaps it was because of the circumstances surrounding the event. He was ill, and his fans probably weren't able to meet with him to give their own gifts that they were planning on giving him.

 

AS far as his family is concerned, if they are not at a public event with him and just walking to the store...than of course it's wrong to take pictures and post them. But if they're with Mika at a public event or singing with him on stage etc...than I don't see how it would matter.

 

His family is extremely laid back and nice however. Introducing yourself to them wouldn't be bad, as long as it was respectful and sincere...not "OMG you're MIKA's MOM!!!!!!!!!" Why should they not be interested in meeting new people, just because they have someone "famous" in their family"? I truly believe that they appreciate the fans, and are grateful to us.

 

On the issue of Mika's sexuality, I think we should approach it as he does....Just not talk about it. He could be gay, straight or bi...WE DON'T KNOW...There's no sense in fussing over it, because it won't be made clear until he makes it obvious that he is in a relationship. Hearts will inevidably be broken, no matter who he dates.

 

We have to remember why we cling to him in the first place...for his music. At the end of the day, there is a world that seperates fans from the celebrities they admire. I honestly do not believe Mika thinks of us here as a different class of people... or people who are overly involved in supporting his career. He appreciates us.

 

In order for him to respect us however, we have to be careful about how we approach his personal life (sexuality, dating etc...) This could quickly turn him off. It's up to every member to obtain good conduct and taste when posting on these forums.

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This is a touchy subject and maybe this was the right time to speak openly about all this. Good initiative :thumb_yello: As I said earlier curiosity is human and I understand that new members want to find out more about M. Sooooo, my personal opinion is:

 

1) On the sexuality issue: the fact is that WE DONT KNOW, so why should we keep discuss it over and over again? Do we lack imagination that much?

 

2) About his family... Yasmine worked with him on LICM, Allegra sang with him on stage, this is public. But when it comes to posting pics that were taken on Fortuné's facebook I think this is going a bit too far... my personal opinion. I don't think Mika would appreciate.

 

3) Does he have a drivers licence and that kind of questions are totally innocent and Mika provokes them contradicting himself in interviews. People need to realize that he makes a lot of things up when answering journalists questions, he admitted him himself, so I think we shouldn't take what he says too seriously ;)

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I'd like to reply to this fully, because I agree

with you on many points... but it's dinner time, so I have

to be brief :)

 

I do just want to say, though, that when I close a thread or

moderate in a thread that's controversial, it's

because I believe that I'm supposed to -- that as a moderator

it's my job to maintain certain standards on the forums.

If I'm doing something I'm NOT supposed to do, I expect

that deano will tell me -- if for example, it's OK to talk

about Mika's sexuality, then all deano has to do is say that

to me and I'll step back. I don't close the threads because

of any personal agenda. (If that was the case then I'd

probably have closed a lot of other threads! :naughty: )

 

So... yes, let's have a discussion about this... although, as a

long-timer here, I think we've even had *this* discussion

before, and if I had time I'd search for it.

 

OK, dinner's ready... I'll be eager to read what's on

your minds when I get back! :thumb_yello:

 

dcdeb

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Does anybody else get the feeling that people don't want to face facts that he might be gay?

 

People seem to be oblivious and happy, because deep down, alot of you (and probably me, a tiny bit) still think of him as ours.

 

And you have to admit it's a little suspicious that he hangs out with / is compared to alot of gay people. Beth Ditto, Perez Hilton, Alan Cumming, etc. And the song 'Billy Brown' isn't autobiographical, but still..............

 

meepmeep.

 

Edit: Also, it is a possibility that he's NOT gay, but since it's well-known how big he is in the gay music scene, maybe he's afraid of losing fans. On both sides of the fence.

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Does anybody else get the feeling that people don't want to face facts that he might be gay?

People seem to be oblivious and happy, because deep down, alot of you (and probably me, a tiny bit) still think of him as ours.

 

And you have to admit it's a little suspicious that he hangs out with / is compared to alot of gay people. Beth Ditto, Perez Hilton, Alan Cumming, etc. And the song 'Billy Brown' isn't autobiographical, but still..............

 

meepmeep.

That's exactly what I think..

I'll be honest.. I fear the day we find out he is gay (if he is)

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I confess that I'm afraid that he turns out gay. not because there's something wrong about it....it's just...I don't know....I have this feeling....Billy Brown it's a clue as you guys say....the world is tricky and you never know...

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Does anybody else get the feeling that people don't want to face facts that he might be gay?

 

People seem to be oblivious and happy, because deep down, alot of you (and probably me, a tiny bit) still think of him as ours.

 

And you have to admit it's a little suspicious that he hangs out with / is compared to alot of gay people. Beth Ditto, Perez Hilton, Alan Cumming, etc. And the song 'Billy Brown' isn't autobiographical, but still..............

 

meepmeep.

 

Edit: Also, it is a possibility that he's NOT gay, but since it's well-known how big he is in the gay music scene, maybe he's afraid of losing fans. On both sides of the fence.

 

You mean denial? Yeah, I think that's the issue... He hasn't admitted anything, but I've always prepared myself for any answer or whatever he choses to reveal because that's how I am. Whatever happens, I'll support him and love him just the same as I do now:wub2:

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Right on Mana:punk: You and I think alike I must say.

 

It's hard to say where I stand, because I'm pretty laid back about these kinds of things. There are always going to be people who want to know where he lives, who he's with and all that. That stuff isn't necessary to loving Mika however. People might just feel it's their right to know...even if it isn't.

 

So, the fact that people dropped gifts off at his house sort of surprised me...but what surprised me more was his reaction to it. He didn't seemed very bothered by it in the slightest. Perhaps it was because of the circumstances surrounding the event. He was ill, and his fans probably weren't able to meet with him to give their own gifts that they were planning on giving him.

 

AS far as his family is concerned, if they are not at a public event with him and just walking to the store...than of course it's wrong to take pictures and post them. But if they're with Mika at a public event or singing with him on stage etc...than I don't see how it would matter.

 

His family is extremely laid back and nice however. Introducing yourself to them wouldn't be bad, as long as it was respectful and sincere...not "OMG you're MIKA's MOM!!!!!!!!!" Why should they not be interested in meeting new people, just because they have someone "famous" in their family"? I truly believe that they appreciate the fans, and are grateful to us.

 

On the issue of Mika's sexuality, I think we should approach it as he does....Just not talk about it. He could be gay, straight or bi...WE DON'T KNOW...There's no sense in fussing over it, because it won't be made clear until he makes it obvious that he is in a relationship. Hearts will inevidably be broken, no matter who he dates.

 

We have to remember why we cling to him in the first place...for his music. At the end of the day, there is a world that seperates fans from the celebrities they admire. I honestly do not believe Mika thinks of us here as a different class of people... or people who are overly involved in supporting his career. He appreciates us.

 

In order for him to respect us however, we have to be careful about how we approach his personal life (sexuality, dating etc...) This could quickly turn him off. It's up to every member to obtain good conduct and taste when posting on these forums.

YOU READ MY THOUGHTS!!!! I'm totall agree with U!!!

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I confess that I'm afraid that he turns out gay. not because there's something wrong about it....it's just...I don't know....I have this feeling....Billy Brown it's a clue as you guys say....the world is tricky and you never know...

 

Didn't he make a comment once when someone asked if he was gay, like "I wrote a song about a gay man who had an affair. What do you think?"

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Didn't he make a comment once when someone asked if he was gay, like "I wrote a song about a gay man who had an affair. What do you think?"

 

Did he really? :blink:

Wow.. now that we talk about it the clues seem to be coming together...

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Did he really? :blink:

Wow.. now that we talk about it the clues seem to be coming together...

 

I'm gonna PM you something in a second. You don't have to reply to it, because I think my inbox is full, but just say on here whether you agree with me or not.

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Didn't he make a comment once when someone asked if he was gay, like "I wrote a song about a gay man who had an affair. What do you think?"

 

I've never seen that interview....what do I think? I think he is saying that he might be gay, or something....but as Bounjour_Mika says, we are his fans and whatever happens we are here to support him even if we like his decision or not....I might be sad, or afraid or whatever but I'm his fan....and even if I don't like it I'M here to show him how important he is!

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What don't people wanna face?

The fact that he might be gay/straight/omnisexual ?

If you ask me I'd say what some people don't wanna face is the fact they'll never date him...

 

:shocked: Such a fantastic thought..

I think everyone here probably either doesn't want to face that he might be gay, or face that they'll never date or marry or be 'close' to him.

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Thanks for this thread. I really think that, if people are mature about it, it can do a bit of good. :thumb_yello:

 

Mika's sexuality: Personally, I don't have a problem with discussion about it, as long as it is done in a mature manner, and not "OMGZ is Mika gay!?!" I don't see what the big deal is, to be honest. I know that Mika doesn't want to talk about it himself, but what's wrong with others discussing it? Homosexuality is a taboo subject to begin with, and for some reason or another, unbeknownst to me, a lot of people are uncomfortable discussing it, even in mature, adult manners. If you sit and think about it, why is it wrong to talk about Mika's sexuality? Of course, some may say "it's irrelevant," "who cares?" and all of that, but of course it is. So are so many other subjects that we discuss incessantly on here. What is the difference between discussing whether Mika waxes his stomach and discussing his sexuality? I'll bet that if he were ever asked if he performed any hair removal in an interview, he would dance around it and not answer, just like he would his sexuality. Just because HE won't talk about something doesn't mean that we shouldn't be allowed to. There's a difference between talking about his sexuality in an adult way, and talking about it in a childish, "Does he have a boyfriend?!?!?" way. It's just a discussion. I don't understand why it's so "off-limits" in the first place. It kind of annoys me to pop into a thread and as soon as someone asks the gay question, the thread is locked and they are told, almost autonomously: "We are not allowed to discuss this here."

 

Family: I think that there definitely should be limits to this. Of course people are going to be curious, and I'll admit that I was at first, but I just think that it should be watched closely. I don't think that there is a problem at all discussing them as far as ages, looks (from PUBLIC photos), etc. go, but there is a fine line between "okay" and "too much" as far as I'm concerned. I am most definitely against posting Facebook and personal photos. People need to realize that these are NORMAL people, not celebrities. They have their friends and their social networking profiles just like all of us. It particularly bothers me with Zuleika and Fortune. They are not in the spotlight at all. Paloma and Yasmine have been in a couple of videos, there was a professional photo of Mika and Yasmine, and they have a large part in his career when it comes to the artwork and fashion. Zuleika has performed on stage, and I think that the video of that is perfectly fine to post, because it was a public event, but she is still not in the public eye. Fortune, on the other hand, has NEVER been in the public eye like that. I really do not like photos of him being posted on here in any way, shape or form unless it happens to be a professional photo, because, on top of everything, he is only fifteen. He is a child and underage. I do not think that it is ethically right to post Facebook photos of someone that you do not know on a public forum for others to look at and scrutinize, regardless to whether they are a sibling of a celebrity or not, particularly when they are so young. I just think: If you happen to find a photo of a Penniman online and it was taken by someone who is not a professional photographer, do not speak of it or post it. You must realize that these are teenagers and young adults with LIVES. They have their friends and their everyday lives just like all of us, and I think that, just like with anyone, personal photos should not be posted without permission.

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Does anybody else get the feeling that people don't want to face facts that he might be gay?

 

People seem to be oblivious and happy, because deep down, alot of you (and probably me, a tiny bit) still think of him as ours.

 

And you have to admit it's a little suspicious that he hangs out with / is compared to alot of gay people. Beth Ditto, Perez Hilton, Alan Cumming, etc. And the song 'Billy Brown' isn't autobiographical, but still..............

 

meepmeep.

 

Edit: Also, it is a possibility that he's NOT gay, but since it's well-known how big he is in the gay music scene, maybe he's afraid of losing fans. On both sides of the fence.

 

 

Perez hilton's goal is to reveal gay artists who don't say they are!! So, he said that Wentworth Miller is gay (he is probably in the wrong)... So, I think if Mika is gay he would say it a long time ago!!!! Before their friendship!....

But it's just my thought!

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:shocked: Such a fantastic thought..

I think everyone here probably either doesn't want to face that he might be gay, or face that they'll never date or marry or be 'close' to him.

 

That's true.

I think the gay boys (like David) are less aprehensive about talking about Mika being gay, not because they secretly think they'll have a chance with him, but because it's not as big of a deal to them as it seems to be to everyone else.

 

And I think even I, deep down somewhere (even though I make jokes about marry him) really would be SLIGHTLY, and I repeat SLIGHTLY crushed. Not because I genuinely think I'm going to marry him, but because like.... I don't know. I guess even if I lived in my little playland with him and Hollis as roommates, he'd still be the roommate I hope doesn't walk in on me naked or see me dancing around my room, because I like him too much.

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:shocked: Such a fantastic thought..

I think everyone here probably either doesn't want to face that he might be gay, or face that they'll never date or marry or be 'close' to him.

 

That's so true :) Most people want to marry him lol...including myself. And that's ok to be all dreamy and stuff as long as it doesn't interfere with reality. I've learned to be more calm about these things too.

However, I always stand for the issue that he could easily date one of us here...There are plenty of smart, fun, talented girls and boys that I'm sure he is capable of falling for. It's obviously up to him:mf_rosetinted: But yes, I think it's safe to say that most will never know that side of him. And that's ok...We have to accept that.

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I agree with a lot of points posed in this thread. I think that anything we post is just out of curiosity, and no one intends to be disrespectful to Mika. I don't think anyone is intentionally trying to pry into his personal life. It's human nature to be curious about things such as this. I, myself, do not care about his sexual orientation in the sense that it will not affect the way I think of him or listen to his music. He is an AMAZING person, and has incredible music. That's why we love him. But I can't deny that I'm a little curious about his orientation. And I can guarantee that I'm not alone. And that's ok, there is nothing wrong with that.

 

I think that's were the line is drawn. Curiosity is not wrong, and I think some people sometimes can't determine a solid difference between curiosity and prying. This is where the problem occurs. Once again, it's OK to be curious. Just as long as everyone is respectful to Mika and his wishes and doesn't go up and ask him about it or something, I think it should be fine.

 

As for family, I think they'd like privacy to a certain point. Obviously if they're at an event in public, posing for pictures, that's ok. But as you guys have said, if they're walking to the store to get some milk and someone is snapping pictures of them I don't think they'd appreciate that. No one really would. I can tell you right now if I were running out of my house in my pajamas really quick to go grab something from the store, I'd probably be a little upset if someone was trying to catch me at one of my most unflattering moments. I think people are aware of stuff like that. But if there are public pictures of them at a special event, I don't see what the problem is.

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