sariflor Posted February 9, 2011 Share Posted February 9, 2011 Mika has made me to think about one thing that i hadn't realized. All these social sites are teaching me to communicate with people and behave in a way that will be handy in RL. In RL i am too polite and hate conflicts. When i started to use social sites (e.g. we have Vkontakte, smth like fb) i accepted any friendship request even if i didn't know these people, just in order to be polite. Now i prefer to click Ignore and choose for myself with whom to communicate. I'm more mature now, and i can see that in my RL i use many skills that I acquired in Internet.Life would be much more boring without Internet. When some people say that i would communicate with people face to face, i say no - I would spend the time just reading books, sitting at home anyway. So Internet really connects people, and not only due to meeting many new friends. My RL friend are busy if I am free, and I am busy when they are free. So instead of loosing contact we can chat at night in Internet!!! You make some very good points there, I totally agree. Also, what I notice is that nowadays on a week night after work if I don't have a lot of time to go out and do something, I will be at home chatting to friends online, whereas in the past I would spend that same time watching some ****ty tv or doing nothing, really. So yes, I totally agree with what you say. And also about learning things and ways to relate to others, etc... What, that I am the arsehole? True, I can be, but only with other arseholes. :roftl: I'm sure that she didn't mean that, Bab. It would be rude and untrue. What DID you mean, leiRe? Do you actually have a point? If you're going to throw around some vague hint that can be construed negatively, I would espext you to have the politeness to explain yourself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dreamy_Queen Posted February 9, 2011 Share Posted February 9, 2011 You make some very good points there, I totally agree. Also, what I notice is that nowadays on a week night after work if I don't have a lot of time to go out and do something, I will be at home chatting to friends online, whereas in the past I would spend that same time watching some ****ty tv or doing nothing, really. So yes, I totally agree with what you say. And also about learning things and ways to relate to others, etc... I'm glad you agree! And what I want to add... Now I'm at MFC, i have a possibility to talk about Mika , get to know the news, when I am sad there are people who understands me, who has the same feelings. 18 years ago i was in love with Freddie Mercury. I had noone to talk to, and all i had to do is to sit and cry. I had to wait for month to watch a Queen vid at TV. Nobody understood me, it was awful. Now nobody would understand me in RL too. It would be the same story if no Internet. I just realized how happy I am now, comparing to those lonely suffering teenage years. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
basicamenteyo Posted February 9, 2011 Share Posted February 9, 2011 You make some very good points there, I totally agree. Also, what I notice is that nowadays on a week night after work if I don't have a lot of time to go out and do something, I will be at home chatting to friends online, whereas in the past I would spend that same time watching some ****ty tv or doing nothing, really. So yes, I totally agree with what you say. And also about learning things and ways to relate to others, etc... :roftl: I'm sure that she didn't mean that, Bab. It would be rude and untrue. What DID you mean, leiRe? Do you actually have a point? If you're going to throw around some vague hint that can be construed negatively, I would espext you to have the politeness to explain yourself. maybe you are expecting too much sara Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RAK1 Posted February 9, 2011 Share Posted February 9, 2011 I'm glad you agree!And what I want to add... Now I'm at MFC, i have a possibility to talk about Mika , get to know the news, when I am sad there are people who understands me, who has the same feelings. 18 years ago i was in love with Freddie Mercury. I had noone to talk to, and all i had to do is to sit and cry. I had to wait for month to watch a Queen vid at TV. Nobody understood me, it was awful. Now nobody would understand me in RL too. It would be the same story if no Internet. I just realized how happy I am now, comparing to those lonely suffering teenage years. I don't disagree, that the internet isn't a good place to go to make friends with people, it's a fantastic place for that. I've met many great friends on here. I've even reconnected with my oldest best friend on it. I'm just not comfortable about the whole internet dating thing. Something about it doesn't feel right. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sariflor Posted February 9, 2011 Share Posted February 9, 2011 I'm glad you agree!And what I want to add... Now I'm at MFC, i have a possibility to talk about Mika , get to know the news, when I am sad there are people who understands me, who has the same feelings. 18 years ago i was in love with Freddie Mercury. I had noone to talk to, and all i had to do is to sit and cry. I had to wait for month to watch a Queen vid at TV. Nobody understood me, it was awful. Now nobody would understand me in RL too. It would be the same story if no Internet. I just realized how happy I am now, comparing to those lonely suffering teenage years. Yep, the internet no doubt helps a lot to bring people close who would probably have never met in the past, if it wasn't for this means of communication. It's pretty amazing, actually. This internet culture fascinates me. The way it shapes society and nothing is the same anymore to pre-internet, when it comes to society. It makes a very interesting sociology topic, I find. For example, I doubt that I would ever be having a chat with you if it wasn't for the internet. Or I would have not met some amazing friends who I made through the internet who live in Canada, or Japan, Australia, etc....... Maybe somewhere in Europe I would have had more chances of 'randomly' meeting someone, but who are we kidding, how on earth would I have met Mana from Calgary without the internet, for example? It's pretty amazing maybe you are expecting too much sara Clearly, I was . Or rather, I see that I was 'espexting' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
basicamenteyo Posted February 9, 2011 Share Posted February 9, 2011 I don't disagree, that the internet isn't a good place to go to make friends with people, it's a fantastic place for that. I've met many great friends on here. I've even reconnected with my oldest best friend on it.I'm just not comfortable about the whole internet dating thing. Something about it doesn't feel right. it´s odd when people who haven´t even met once,decide to travel to the other side of the world to marry someone who they don´t know.. but if you meet someone in the net,and then you meet him/her in real life... well... why not?? for example,we only have talked here,not in rl,but well,we can meet in real life and after that decide if we are going to be friends or not... i think the net is only a tool we can use now... Clearly, I was . Or rather, I see that I was 'espexting' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CazGirl Posted February 9, 2011 Share Posted February 9, 2011 it´s odd when people who haven´t even met once,decide to travel to the other side of the world to marry someone who they don´t know.. but if you meet someone in the net,and then you meet him/her in real life... well... why not?? for example,we only have talked here,not in rl,but well,we can meet in real life and after that decide if we are going to be friends or not... i think the net is only a tool we can use now... Yeah, arranged marriages for example. Some girls in other cultures get treated badly and are sometimes forced to marry men they don't even know. At least with internet dating you get some sort of idea Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
basicamenteyo Posted February 9, 2011 Share Posted February 9, 2011 Yeah, arranged marriages for example. Some girls in other cultures get treated badly and are sometimes forced to marry men they don't even know. At least with internet dating you get some sort of idea and you can choose them!!! not like these girls you are talking about... we are in the XXI century FFS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
basicamenteyo Posted February 9, 2011 Share Posted February 9, 2011 if mika reads the forum sure he won´t be in a hurry with his third album... he may think he can entertain us with a simple column each month Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LeiRe Posted February 9, 2011 Share Posted February 9, 2011 What DID you mean, leiRe? Do you actually have a point? If you're going to throw around some vague hint that can be construed negatively, I would espext you to have the politeness to explain yourself. Why negatively? This is actually getting tiresome (ages ago), which is exactly what you aim at… I can't say a word without you getting me wrong, apparently! I just meant that quote could be applied to some fans, the craziest and most delusive fans in Mikaland, of course. That was all! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
suzie Posted February 9, 2011 Share Posted February 9, 2011 My favourite quote The fact that I knew so much about the person before going on a single date, accelerated the relationship. All this information made me think I would be with that person for a long time. It enabled me to become close, even obsessed very quickly. What I didn’t understand was that knowing more about the other person didn’t make me a more suitable partner and I should have been more guarded. That's my favourite part of that article, too.. I think it actually also sums up the relationship between fans and the object of their fandom. It is basically works for one person (i.e. the fan) because they think they know enough about the object of their obsession to reassure them this person is 'the one'. Therefore, this one-sided attachment builds up quickly. However, it does not mean that the object of such love would share similarly strong feelings or be emotionally involved at all with the other one if any meeting ever took place in real life. PS: I know this idea is a bit far-fetched, but that's what it reminded me of Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CazGirl Posted February 9, 2011 Share Posted February 9, 2011 and you can choose them!!! not like these girls you are talking about... we are in the XXI century FFS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! exactly! Internet dating is a modern way of communicating with other people. Like I previously stated, it's not for everyone, but I think there are more success stories rather than horror ones. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
basicamenteyo Posted February 9, 2011 Share Posted February 9, 2011 That's my favourite part of that article, too.. I think it actually also sums up the relationship between fans and the object of their fandom. It is basically works for one person (i.e. the fan) because they think they know enough about the object of their obsession to reassure them this person is 'the one'. Therefore, this one-sided attachment builds up quickly. However, it does not mean that the object of such love would share similarly strong feelings or be emotionally involved at all with the other one if any meeting ever took place in real life. PS: I know this idea is a bit far-fetched, but that's what it reminded me of oh my god!!! then... he doesn´t love me as much as i do???? exactly! Internet dating is a modern way of communicating with other people. Like I previously stated, it's not for everyone, but I think there are more success stories rather than horror ones. i think so too.... if internet is used by grown up people,i think it´s quite safe... if you are fooled there,it´s because you can be fooled in rl too... IMO,of course.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sariflor Posted February 9, 2011 Share Posted February 9, 2011 Why negatively? This is actually getting tiresome (ages ago), which is exactly what you aim at… I can't say a word without you getting me wrong, apparently! I just meant that quote could be applied to some fans, the craziest and most delusive fans in Mikaland, of course. That was all! Well, had you explained yourself properly in the first place instead of making a very vague and open comment, we wouldn't be having this conversation You are only perceived to come across negatively because you always seem to have something negative to say , it didn't just come out of nowhere. That's my favourite part of that article, too.. I think it actually also sums up the relationship between fans and the object of their fandom. It is basically works for one person (i.e. the fan) because they think they know enough about the object of their obsession to reassure them this person is 'the one'. Therefore, this one-sided attachment builds up quickly. However, it does not mean that the object of such love would share similarly strong feelings or be emotionally involved at all with the other one if any meeting ever took place in real life. PS: I know this idea is a bit far-fetched, but that's what it reminded me of I think that is a very good point, and I totally agree with your explanation as well. All the information creates an illusion of familiarity that is not real. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RAK1 Posted February 9, 2011 Share Posted February 9, 2011 Yeah, arranged marriages for example. Some girls in other cultures get treated badly and are sometimes forced to marry men they don't even know. At least with internet dating you get some sort of idea Don't get me started on arranged marriages! I know it's part of whichever culture, but I find it horrendous that people are basically selling their kids (with the dowry that they give to the other family, for the priviledge of marrying "up"), and the kids are pushed into it, and most of the time it's a promise from birth, so the kids don't get any say whatsoever. A friend I made when I was living in Manchester, was trying to get a divorce from her arranged marriage, the guy was much older than her, she was only 19, and both families were making it as difficult as possible for her to do it. She just about managed it before I left there, but her life was hell. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dreamy_Queen Posted February 9, 2011 Share Posted February 9, 2011 oh my god!!! then... he doesn´t love me as much as i do???? . What? Do you love him? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
basicamenteyo Posted February 9, 2011 Share Posted February 9, 2011 What? Do you love him? him? who? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dreamy_Queen Posted February 9, 2011 Share Posted February 9, 2011 him? who? Justin Bieber, of course:naughty: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
basicamenteyo Posted February 9, 2011 Share Posted February 9, 2011 Justin Bieber, of course:naughty: oh,of course i love him Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CazGirl Posted February 9, 2011 Share Posted February 9, 2011 Don't get me started on arranged marriages!I know it's part of whichever culture, but I find it horrendous that people are basically selling their kids (with the dowry that they give to the other family, for the priviledge of marrying "up"), and the kids are pushed into it, and most of the time it's a promise from birth, so the kids don't get any say whatsoever. A friend I made when I was living in Manchester, was trying to get a divorce from her arranged marriage, the guy was much older than her, she was only 19, and both families were making it as difficult as possible for her to do it. She just about managed it before I left there, but her life was hell. It's not always like that though, but a lot of cases are. When I was studying ChildCare we had a girl who was from Banghladesh origin (spelling?) and she was in an arranged marriage. At the time she was only 16 but she knew who he was, had met him (even though he lived in Banghladesh and she lived in the UK) and they were arranged to marry on my birthday in 2008. But she was really happy with it and her parents never pressured her. As far as I'm aware she lives out there now and is still married to him but I haven't been in contact with her since. So sometimes it can work out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dreamy_Queen Posted February 9, 2011 Share Posted February 9, 2011 oh,of course i love him Bad girl. You forgot Mika? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
basicamenteyo Posted February 9, 2011 Share Posted February 9, 2011 Bad girl. You forgot Mika? mika? who is mika?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LeiRe Posted February 9, 2011 Share Posted February 9, 2011 Well, had you explained yourself properly in the first place instead of making a very vague and open comment, we wouldn't be having this conversation You are only perceived to come across negatively because you always seem to have something negative to say , it didn't just come out of nowhere. Sure! That's YOUR opinion, and 4-5 other people's Negative = what one doesn't like to hear = Perfectly positive for me Had you ignored my former light posts all the way, we would have been much more relaxed as well... Am I the only one making "vague" comments? I don't think so... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dreamy_Queen Posted February 9, 2011 Share Posted February 9, 2011 mika? who is mika?? Mika Hakkinen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CazGirl Posted February 9, 2011 Share Posted February 9, 2011 Sure! That's YOUR opinion, and 4-5 other people's Negative = what one doesn't like to hear = Perfectly positive for me Had you ignored my former light posts all the way, we would have been much more relaxed as well... Am I the only one making "vague" comments? I don't think so... well at least when Sara is trying to put her point across or is replying to someone's comment she is quoting the person she is talking to, unlike you who makes comments that appear to be unrelated to the issue and confuse members, especially as you didn't quote anyone to support your statement when Babs and Sara spoke to you a few pages back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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