Etoile2roses Posted February 6, 2011 Share Posted February 6, 2011 well, he has just as much right to analyse and judge the situation as you thought you had when judging his comment.... Yes you are right as soon as he is judging this situation without analyse it really I am judging his comment without trying to understand why he does not think before posting such judgement it calls the boomerang theory PS: I love that song from Alphaville I love it too Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marilyn Mastin Posted February 6, 2011 Share Posted February 6, 2011 oh my, you sure can talk alot of crazy things over something that hasent come out jet it was hard finding the summary:naughty: thanks!! it looks so promising that made me think about Pick Up Off The Floor:blink: Me too. Arn't a lot of his songs about his own experiences? I think that's what he's always meant by his comments about needing to do the 1st two albums and get stuff out of his system, before he felt free to do something different. This is only me speculating however. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sariflor Posted February 6, 2011 Share Posted February 6, 2011 Maybe this woman in the coffee shop did not want to have a relashion with this guy on internet because she had already a bad experience or she thought that it can be "dangerous" to show a part of her life throught facebook to someone she does not know... it exists bad stories throught internet and bad meeting... so sorry to say that Mika has not got the right to say what he said since he doesn't know what's really going on, on the head of this woman, and on the head of this man, to finish his comment like that... well, he has just as much right to analyse and judge the situation as you thought you had when judging his comment.... Yes you are right as soon as he is judging this situation without analyse it really I am judging his comment without trying to understand why he does not think before posting such judgement it calls the boomerang theory Well, the way I took his comment (and I agree with him) is that what he thinks is that the boy was asking the girl for her Facebook as a means of contact. It would be the same to ask for her phone number, or email address, etc... Just that Facebook is a bit 'safer' a way to contact strangers, because if you don't want to ever see them or let them contact you again, you block or ignore them, and that is it. You are not giving away personal details such as address, telephone number, email, etc... When the boy asks the girl if she's on FB he's effectively saying that he would like to have a way to be in touch, and I am guessing that the logical thing would be that he was expecting them to meet in real life, and using FB as a way to arrange dates, etc... Which is perfectly normal and happens a lot When the girl is giving him this response, I also agree with what Mika says. She is just saying that as a way of rejecting the boy, because she doesn't like him and doesn't want to keep in contact with him. The 'I prefer reality' thing just sounds like a snobby and silly way IMO to deliver the message. It would have been bigger of her to say something polite like 'thanks but I'm not interested', etc...There is no need to imply that the boy has gotten it all wrong for using Facebook. On the subject of internet and social networking sites or the use of internet as a means to meet or keep in touch with people, I must say that in my view it totally depends on how people use it. Of course some people can use it in a totally pointless way, just as a means to superficially have tons of relationships to make them feel cool, etc... but if it's used properly it can be an invaluable tool to get in touch with others, or keep in touch, and to communicate. It doesn't have to substitute a healthy personal 'real' life, but it can totally complement it in a very effective way. The internet is the tool which provides the opportunities; It's up to the individuals to use them smartly, as is the case with anything else in life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
guylainem123 Posted February 6, 2011 Share Posted February 6, 2011 When the girl is giving him this response, I also agree with what Mika says. She is just saying that as a way of rejecting the boy, because she doesn't like him and doesn't want to keep in contact with him. The 'I prefer reality' thing just sounds like a snobby and silly way IMO to deliver the message. It would have been bigger of her to say something polite like 'thanks but I'm not interested', etc...There is no need to imply that the boy has gotten it all wrong for using Facebook. and let's say it had been true, that she "prefered reality" and was interested in the boy... she would have given him her phone number, as i did in my dating days, before internet Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sariflor Posted February 6, 2011 Share Posted February 6, 2011 and let's say it had been true, that she "prefered reality" and was interested in the boy... she would have given him her phone number, as i did in my dating days, before internet Exactly what I'm getting at Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Etoile2roses Posted February 6, 2011 Share Posted February 6, 2011 (edited) Well, the way I took his comment (and I agree with him) is that what he thinks is that the boy was asking the girl for her Facebook as a means of contact. It would be the same to ask for her phone number, or email address, etc... Just that Facebook is a bit 'safer' a way to contact strangers, because if you don't want to ever see them or let them contact you again, you block or ignore them, and that is it. You are not giving away personal details such as address, telephone number, email, etc... When the boy asks the girl if she's on FB he's effectively saying that he would like to have a way to be in touch, and I am guessing that the logical thing would be that he was expecting them to meet in real life, and using FB as a way to arrange dates, etc... Which is perfectly normal and happens a lot When the girl is giving him this response, I also agree with what Mika says. She is just saying that as a way of rejecting the boy, because she doesn't like him and doesn't want to keep in contact with him. The 'I prefer reality' thing just sounds like a snobby and silly way IMO to deliver the message. It would have been bigger of her to say something polite like 'thanks but I'm not interested', etc...There is no need to imply that the boy has gotten it all wrong for using Facebook. On facebook you have certains pictures available and your adress email also but again maybe she said "I prefer to stay in touch in real life" waiting for him to propose a date or to give his telephone number and he did not think to give it to her ? Sometimes girls make some suggestions and boys does not take a second step . Or maybe it was a nice way (I say nice not kind ) to do not say "I am not interested" as some people sometimes does not want to say truth to others thinking that they will loose them or hurt them... and there is no need to imply that some people has gotten it all wrong for not using Facebook, I do understand them, some of my closer friends or members of my family do not have it, and so what ? It did not change the way they are and how I am happy to know them and to stay in touch with them without any social network... Edited February 6, 2011 by Etoile2roses Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katydid1994 Posted February 6, 2011 Share Posted February 6, 2011 I've had friends who were broken up with, by logging onto facebook and seeing that their boyfriend had updated himself as now single. That's so harsh! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sariflor Posted February 6, 2011 Share Posted February 6, 2011 On facebook you have certains pictures available and your adress email also but again maybe she said "I prefer to stay in touch in real life" waiting for him to propose a date or to give his telephone number and he did not think to give it to her ? Sometimes girls make some suggestions and boys does not take a second step . Or maybe it was a nice way (I say nice not kind ) to do not say "I am not interested" as some people sometimes does not want to say truth to others thinking that they will loose them or hurt them... and there is no need to imply that some people has gotten it all wrong for not using Facebook, I do understand them, some of my closer friends or members of my family do not have it, and so what ? It did not change the way they are and how I am happy to know them and to stay in touch with them without any social network... If you use the privacy functions of Facebook to a high setting, you can have a Facebook account so that none of your contacts see an email address or any other means of identification. Heck, you can even not let them see any pictures if you so wish. Basically, it's as public or as private as you want it to be, if you use the privacy options properly. Secondly, yes, I agree that sometimes girls say things that guys don't 'get', but in this case, and I am a girl myself, I find that she was a bit too harsh and even rude, implying with her response that it was a bad thing to use Facebook because it was incompatible with 'living in reality'. I'm all for letting someone down gently, but IMHO this was not gentle . Lastly, where or when have I said that people not using Facebook have gotten it all wrong? All I am saying is that people should not be negative about the ones who choose to use it. Each to their own and all that. It is a fact that it can be a good tool if used the right way, but obviously I am not going to ostracise someone because they don't use Facebook Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sariflor Posted February 6, 2011 Share Posted February 6, 2011 If you use the privacy functions of Facebook to a high setting, you can have a Facebook account so that none of your contacts see an email address or any other means of identification. Heck, you can even not let them see any pictures if you so wish. Basically, it's as public or as private as you want it to be, if you use the privacy options properly. Secondly, yes, I agree that sometimes girls say things that guys don't 'get', but in this case, and I am a girl myself, I find that she was a bit too harsh and even rude, implying with her response that it was a bad thing to use Facebook because it was incompatible with 'living in reality'. I'm all for letting someone down gently, but IMHO this was not gentle . Lastly, where or when have I said that people not using Facebook have gotten it all wrong? All I am saying is that people should not be negative about the ones who choose to use it. Each to their own and all that. It is a fact that it can be a good tool if used the right way, but obviously I am not going to ostracise someone because they don't use Facebook Or did you mean Mika had implied it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
francoise Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 Thanks Robi, Nezza and Crazyaboutmika for teasing us Now waiting for the original version... impatiently Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Etoile2roses Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 Lastly, where or when have I said that people not using Facebook have gotten it all wrong? All I am saying is that people should not be negative about the ones who choose to use it. Each to their own and all that. It is a fact that it can be a good tool if used the right way, but obviously I am not going to ostracise someone because they don't use Facebook +1 I never said that you said it but I wanted to mention it in a time where if you don't have facebook you sound like a loser (I heard that around me by people that are pro-facebook) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dreamy_Queen Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 Thanks Robi, Nezza and Crazyaboutmika for teasing us Now waiting for the original version... impatiently patiently? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sienna Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 +1 I never said that you said it but I wanted to mention it in a time where if you don't have facebook you sound like a loser (I heard that around me by people that are pro-facebook) I don't use facebook! Am I a loser? Maybe...but that's okay! I don't use it because I don't trust myself enough with the technical stuff to be sure that I could make it private enough. And I wouldn't want my boss or coo workers or customers or neighbours or just anyone who happens to know my name to be able to see whatever it is you can see on a facebook page. So, it's not for everybody and I belong to the lost generation anyway! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RAK1 Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 I don't use facebook! Am I a loser? Maybe...but that's okay! I don't use it because I don't trust myself enough with the technical stuff to be sure that I could make it private enough. And I wouldn't want my boss or coo workers or customers or neighbours or just anyone who happens to know my name to be able to see whatever it is you can see on a facebook page. So, it's not for everybody and I belong to the lost generation anyway! Not really a big fan of Facebook, even though I am on there, I really prefer Myspace. Although that seems to be morphing into a Facebook type site now, sadly! I honestly would never go on these sites to get dates. You really don't know who it is who is replying to you, it's so easy for anyone to fabricate a personality on them, use pics that aren't themselves, just to get you interested. At least meeting someone in a RL social situation, you see who they are, and if they are with their friends, you can get an inkling to what they are like, and make your mind up from there if you want to take it further. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charlotte_ Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 I can't handle it anymore, I NEED to read that collumn now Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Siu Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 patiently? Very patiently :squirrel: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
suzie Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 I don't use facebook! Am I a loser? Maybe...but that's okay! No, I don't think so. You simply sound wise since you are aware of your lack of 'technical skills' to hide all the information on yourself that are not for everyone to view. I must add it is not so difficult to use all the privacy settings I have been member of FB for a long time but never used it - did not even check my friends' updates. What's so fun about something that anyone can read? My life is not an open book. It wasn't until I learned about the possibility of the different types of privacy settings that I really started to use FB and now I am a regular user, although I don't post much. I partly use it to archive some of my photos (giving access to different groups of people, based on content) and be aware of what is happening as there are some great articles and videos my friends recommend me. However, FB is still a perfect playground for stalkers - young people often do not realise it. Once I heard someone in a senior position at my company comment how someone should really remind John Doe that he has some really weird friends....etc I have also heard that HR in some companies tracks the social network of job applicants So, not even my friends can see my other friends and most of them can't see what I comment on other people's pages, either:teehee: ... At least I feel safe. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Siu Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 Not really a big fan of Facebook, even though I am on there, I really prefer Myspace. Although that seems to be morphing into a Facebook type site now, sadly!I honestly would never go on these sites to get dates. You really don't know who it is who is replying to you, it's so easy for anyone to fabricate a personality on them, use pics that aren't themselves, just to get you interested. At least meeting someone in a RL social situation, you see who they are, and if they are with their friends, you can get an inkling to what they are like, and make your mind up from there if you want to take it further. I think I'm truly old-fashioned. I have a FB account for my company for advertising purposes; I made a personal account a week ago but haven't got around to using it and I doubt I ever will . Myspace - what's that ? Twitter - for voting 99%. If someone asked me for my FB account or similar to keep in touch I'd give the same reply as the girl in MIKA's column and it would not necessarily mean I'm not interested. I do prefer getting to know people first hand, especially after having had a few experiences with getting a completely wrong impression of people based on what they chose to share on the internet. I believe people paint a more socially acceptable picture of themselves on the internet, which is not so easy in RL simply because in RL you can't filter out the undesirable. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FralovesMika Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 On the Facebook page of La Repubblica they said me they'll post the original soon but dunno how much soon LOL! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
francoise Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 patiently? yes of course patiently.. but more like this :boing: than like this if you see what I mean.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marilyn Mastin Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 *Is trying to be patient.* I've never really got into fb or ms, I prefer Twitter. I did have a ms page for a while, and I've been on fb on and off, but I don't like either of them. For me, Twitter is easier to use and you don't have peeps sending 'gifts', which you then have to send to your friends. Some people like that, but it gets on my nerves. I've never needed to use Social Networking sites for dating purposes because I was married in 1981, many years before the internet took hold, but I actually met Alan at a singles club, which is how some couples met before the internet. I suppose it's a similar thing in a way. People went there because they were lonely and wanted to meet someone. I never went to the discos (also picking-up places) so I hadn't really met anyone long-term before Alan. My sister met her hubby through a Lonely-Hearts column in the local paper. They have been married a long time and are very happy. I'm sure there are success stories connected with internet dating, but more care is needed because you can't get a true idea of a person by written messages, and they can also send you a picture of themselves, which isn't actually them, so you never know for sure, and when you meet them you could be setting yourself up for heartbreak/a scam/to be murdered by a psycho. But I did hear of two Star Trek fans who met on a ST forum and got together. I think if two people share an interest, like ST, or even Mika, they can get together and it's okay because they've met through their shared interests. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crazyaboutmika Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 Trying to be patient too, but can't wait And loving all my friends I met through MFC, twitter and fb, although on fb I have friends from my before Mika life Internet is part of our daily life now and I think this is a very good thing Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fran Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 No, I don't think so. You simply sound wise since you are aware of your lack of 'technical skills' to hide all the information on yourself that are not for everyone to view. I must add it is not so difficult to use all the privacy settings I have been member of FB for a long time but never used it - did not even check my friends' updates. What's so fun about something that anyone can read? My life is not an open book. It wasn't until I learned about the possibility of the different types of privacy settings that I really started to use FB and now I am a regular user, although I don't post much. I partly use it to archive some of my photos (giving access to different groups of people, based on content) and be aware of what is happening as there are some great articles and videos my friends recommend me. However, FB is still a perfect playground for stalkers - young people often do not realise it. Once I heard someone in a senior position at my company comment how someone should really remind John Doe that he has some really weird friends....etc I have also heard that HR in some companies tracks the social network of job applicants So, not even my friends can see my other friends and most of them can't see what I comment on other people's pages, either:teehee: ... At least I feel safe. OMG, maybe you should give me some lessons about FB privacy settings then! There's nothing worse for me than being marked on a FB pic... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
suzie Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 OMG, maybe you should give me some lessons about FB privacy settings then! There's nothing worse for me than being marked on a FB pic... when you view the picture you can actually delete the tag with your own name (just click on 'delete tag') Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaReine Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 I have to say that most of you are right! I have Facebook (and had a MySpace profile which I deleted cause I made a Facebook profile and stopped using MySpace).But I hide most content from strangers and only accept people I know. When it comes to dating and meeting new people: Everyone I met in the last year was in real life and then I got their phone number and we would start texting and calling each other and eventually it ended up with Facebook. But a friend of mine met a guy on Facebook and he even drove like 600km just to meet her.That's when they started going out. So my opinion concerning those social networks is rather positive.But I see it as an addition to Real Life not as a substitute. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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